That weeks and months of waiting for an appointment with a doctor is frustrating and irritating, at least it is for me. I hope you get a better neurologist. Do you live within driving range of a university hospital? They often have more resources than locals.
Chronic pain definitely has an impact on our mental health. I'm going on 15 years of that combination. The neuropathy pain began after I'd been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist, and the pain really slowed down the process of achieving any progress in my mental state. I think that it's likely that I'll need to take antidepressants for the rest of my life.
There are multiple ways to meditate. After I told my doctor about my suicide attempts, he could have put me in the hospital, but he let me go home to have two days to delegate my jobs, then I admitted myself to a small, brand new facility for people like me. I tell you that to tell you how they taught meditation.
The process of their meditation involved mindfulness and emptying one's mind. I couldn't do that because I believe that it's dangerous to empty my mind.
I meditate by emptying out the negative, harmful junk from my mind and focus on healthy things. For example, I will sometimes focus on a verse or a phrase from the Bible. Focusing on something like that tends to clear my mind, and I begin letting go of my worries and relax in the moment. It's something I do when I have a panic attack, or when I'm stressed or scared. My feeling is that keeping it simple makes meditation easier. I don't think that it matters how long I meditate, 2 minutes or 30 – whatever I have time for.
I'm seeing a neurologist now whom I didn't like a few years ago. He's shy and very soft spoken, and I didn't think he was doing anything to help me. After seeing two other neurologists, I gave him a second try and I like him. I initiate discussions and ask questions, and it draws him out. I think, too, that he's developed his communication skills over the years when I didn't see him.
I'm not going to any therapy now. I had a really good therapist but he had to quit and move for family problem. I went to the woman who took his place, but I don't click with her, so I stopped therapy a couple of months ago. It's hard to find a therapist who takes Medicare. The only ones who do accept it work for the hospital. There's no counselor or therapist within 120 miles that I can see. That's one of the trade offs we make to live where we do.