@mandrake70 I’m impressed, you sound so much better and like you said to your wife what you needed to say. That’s really great.
When you and your wife talk tomorrow try to not make issues out of small things. Then it diminishes the real issues. I used to have to tell my husband that. Sometimes with our kids he would be upset over trivial things but there were some major issues that would slide by.
When it comes to making dinner, I do know of a number of families where the mother works so the kids have to pitch in a lot, getting dinner started or totally making it, and other household chores. My husband was divorced and had custody of his son and daughter. They were 13 and 15 when he got divorced. They did have to help and his daughter did on some nights make the dinner. Often that makes them more responsible. Frankly my kids were somewhat spoiled because I didn’t work while they were growing up, I resumed working just before my daughter started college so I could contribute to the two college tuitions.

I hope things go well with your wife tomorrow. If you both manage to not be combative it should be constructive.
JK