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Stress/Anxiety/Insomnia/Memory Issues
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Nov 25, 2020 | Replies (135)Comment receiving replies
@jimhd Thanks. I can't get my wife into counseling. She has decided it won't help since it didn't help when we did it 7 years ago. I just got an email back from her saying that our daughter was fine last night and this morning and that she just needed to vent to someone on Monday. I'm worried that my wife isn't taking this as seriously as she should. She was crying at the initial meeting yesterday after our daughter said she had thought about suicide but today she says our daughter was fine and just needed to vent.
My daughter and I have been talking about the ketamine treatments I have been taking and she made a comment about probably needing them at some point. I'm hoping the therapy will help but I have been thinking about medication as well. I will need to see what the therapist thinks after talking to her next week, assuming there isn't a problem with me talking to the therapist. I think it should be OK.
I've been trying to work on self-love for the last few months but it has been difficult. I have some support from a few friends and my mother - I am trying not to burden the kids with how I am doing. And am trying to find a therapist for myself. Waiting to hear back from the last one I called.
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@mandrake70 I know that a lot of people try to get a depressed friend or family member to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, another variation on the fake it idea. I was in a NAMI class a couple of years ago, and a woman told us that her boyfriend happened to stop by the night before, just after she had attempted suicide. She would have died if he hadn't shown up. A woman in the group said "suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem." She got pretty angry with me when I spoke up (very out of character for me) and told her and the group that when a person is planning their demise they aren't in a rational mind. Telling her that does no good and is probably counterproductive.
Anyway, I'm very sorry to hear that your wife thinks that your daughter just needed to talk, and is fine today. If you or your daughter had a case of the blues, you could fake happiness and thus feel better. But the blues and major depression are two very different conditions, especially if thoughts about wanting to die accompany it. Major depression, also called chronic or clinical depression, is diagnosed if the depression lasts for more than a few weeks. I don't remember the details but you can Google depression quiz and learn more. Am I right in thinking that you already know that you have major depression? And maybe your daughter?
I was 55 when I first became suicidal and was clinically depressed. It was clear that I wasn't functioning at work, and my family doctor told me that I should retire on SS disability. I put off doing that for six months. We had bought a place two years earlier that we planned to rent out for ten years until I retired. So, when I had to retire two years after buying the home, at least we had a place to live with no mortgage. I said all that to say that I know how hard it is to work when you're unwell. And you have way too much on your plate right now to do it alone. I hope that the therapist is a good fit for you and the same for your daughter.
Gotta get up from my recliner and eat supper. Hang on. As much as you can, take things one at a time.
Jim