Hello Chris

I sincerely thank you for such a heartfelt response. You pegged me without a doubt! I do care alot.

I will first start by saying that my whole life I have been anti drugs, alcohol, smoking. I have been forced to become accepting of my need for pain medication. Early on I resisted meds and tried my best to use inner strength, will power and natural remedies. It was a fail and I eventually opened the door to medications out of necessity, impatience and desperation. Currently I take
Norco 5-325 (hydrocodone/acetaminophen), Lyrica CR 165mg and Duloxetine 60mg. These were all drugs I agreed to for quick support while Doctors and I continued to trudge through to a final diagnosis in February.

Now that I have gained knowledge while still working on acceptance of my diagnosis, I realize it's with me for life...It's time to stop masking pain, attempt to regenerate nerves (if possible) and allow my body to move forward as healthy as possible. In finding that balance I am building up my supplement/vitamin intake, decreasing sugars and processed foods, trying to keep my activity balanced between light excercise (as my body permits) and appropriate rest.

I want to find substitutes for my current meds. Ones that will not cause long term harm to my brain and organs, however, I know there are no guarantees with anything. It's a scary thing because I want qiick help when I need it for pain and I'm not ready to wean off meds until I know an effective back up plan in is place.

As for my pain... I feel like my body is a loaded weapon with a plethora of symptoms. The most debilitating pain stems from my legs...
numbness, pins and needles, cold flush, sunburn sensations, vibrations, heavy and dead feeling. Cramping, pain and tightness in calves and multiple days with unrelenting burning ache. I now have one speed of walking and need to stop and take breaks. If I can drive, it is limited to 15 minutes max one way and that may mean putting the car in park at traffic lights or just coasting when I can to avoid using my legs.

My right foot has constant pain in big toe joint with shocking jolts at times. Across shoulders down arms burn with weakness in hands and fingers at times or deep bone aches with tingles. Right shoulder and arm will be stricken with pain and throb then go numb and tingle. Neck and up back of head get tight and sore at times. Scalp goes through days of sensitivity to touch. Difficulty regulating body temp, although this has gotten much better since B12 has leveled off, as did palpitations, dizziness and heavy breathing.

Once I fall asleep at night I'm generally able to stay asleep. It's about getting to that point though with the discomfort of pain and various symptoms. Many nights I lay awake for an hour or two before I can find a comfortable position or compromise, either waiting for the next hydro to kick in or finding an alternative like heat.

My pain meds do provide comfort at times and other times they simply can't keep up. I take 3 hydro on a good day and 5 on worse days.

I try so hard to keep stress to a minimum because that entices my nerves but some days it wins out. My daughter just went to college and my husband and I are adjusting to being empty nesters after 26 years.

That means my son is 26 and is getting married next June. He just got a beautiful German Shepherd puppy! My children are my best medicine and for me distraction can be key.

I do enjoy these positive parts of my life and am very grateful although my limitations frustrate me tremendously when I think of not being able to be what I used to be in regard to grandchildren one day.

To conclude, thank you so very much for taking the time to read this super long post! I look forward to any insight and advice you wish to share or offer and hope you are having a pleasant day. You are a gem!

~Rachel

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