Hello @maone, When you say, "The only new thing is we don’t think we’ll hear from him," I think that this idea represents acceptance of this unfortunate situation. If so, acceptance is a good place to start. I'm sure in time, you will adjust to this "new normal" and be able to rebuild your family around those who are left for you to love and care for. I have a feeling that your son misses you as much as you miss him and thinks about you with fondness.

You show incredible strength and determination as you face this difficulty. Blessings and prayers are going your way.