Hello Vicky, We do become different and learn from it. But at times hurt. Years ago a friend had Leukemia. She's good now! My choice, He mother was so frighted she would loose her daughter. Husband and I listened, became close, I loved her so much. Spent time with her. So was upset over her family arguing over my friends care. With her permission I called American Cancer Society, how to help them. With her permission they contacted the family. I'm telling this for a reason. My friend the daughter asked me to put makeup on her we had fun. I did the laundry for her children, helped with the dog, had her children for dinner. Hospital is in NYC so a friend and I drove there twice a week. She has a great sense of humor, it helped a lot!! I took care because I wanted to no one asked me. After she was in remission, still is, Her brother gave her a Hugh 50th Birthday Party. Friend and brother called people up to thank them, I was never called. It hurt me a lot, I got over it. My husband was lived but calmed down. I know I did the right thing and NO ONE can take that away from me. If it were not for my friends health I would never have gotten so close to her Mother. I called her my second mom. When she passed away I lost that extra special person in my life. We stayed friends but not in the same way. No accolades, a hug.