Thanks for the reply. The positive stories of resilience will help me deal with this. I saw a woman at a local health food store who was using a portable oxygen pack and asked her to talk to me. She was diagnosed with pulmonary hypertension 21 years ago. She said she went on oxygen in 2007. She travels, she gets around, she does what she wants, so that encouraged me also. She looks healthy aside from the oxygen pack. I gave her my number in case she feels like talking to me more about it.
It's one challenge after another, isn't it? When I feel real badly (I haven't felt good since my diagnosis--I think it's the Eliquis they put me on), I berate myself for getting smoke inhalation, for not taking more care not to get sick from clients, for drinking wine every night with dinner, and think "I am SO sorry for whatever I did to bring this on myself." It's true that once you lose your health there isn't much left. It's a challenge to get through the day now between the crazy heart and difficulty breathing, which I'm sure are connected.