@pearlbaby7 I am sending you cyber hugs. Feeling vulnerable but still having the strength to reach out for help is a major positive. Don't ever forget that. When we are in a downswing and we can't even see a glimmer of light from the surface, that is when it can be so devastating. Just one little pinprick of light may help us refocus and help us get through those down times/dark times and those times when we feel like such a burden to ourselves and others. I am so glad that you're here on Mayo Connect.