1. < Just Want to Talk

Need help understanding a man's point of view

Posted by Laura48(Laura Walters) @david33, Mar 18, 2019

My name is Laura, and my husband had a shunt put into his head to relieve the fluid off his brain. When this first happened I ignored his mood swings believing that it was due to the shunt and him being depressed because he can no longer work. Now I'm told by his doctor's that this is not the case.
When we got married everything was perfect, now that it's going on 15 years of marriage he has been acting and doing crazy things. He is a step-dad of my daughter, and while she was pregnant he took care of her like a husband/boyfriend would. Now that our grandson is born, he became over bearing, and ignorant to me.
EXAMPLE: If our daughter does something wrong and we get into an arguement, he would yell at me and tell me to leave her alone.

Am I wrong to think he wants a relationship with my daughter?
He says no, but the text messages that he sends to our daughter (she shows me) and the way he acts around her is putting crazy thought into my head. I have trust isses as it is with an affair he had 3 years ago.

Please, can someone help me to understand.
Is it a mid-life crisis?
The shunt?
Or is it just me seeing and hearing whats not there?

I don't trust counceling because the last time I went,and I was in the middle of explaining my issue the doctor brought my husband and daughter into the room and ignored me after that.
If anyone needs more detail to help me you can send me a personal message.

Thank you

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Just Want to Talk Support Group.

Laura48(Laura Walters) | @david33 | Mar 22, 2019

Thank you all, I feel like the third wheel in this relationship. Ever since he got the shunt he's been making excuses, the affair I forgave him but I'm still working on the trust issue....but with our daughter (his step daughter) everything is going down hill for me.

I will give you all an update, on what happens with me seeking help, and him having his shunt replaced.

REPLY
Laura48(Laura Walters) | @david33 | Mar 25, 2019

Update,
The doctor thinks it's his memory changing due to his shut and his doctor is going to try and fix it tomorrow. My therapist wants me to hold my head high and try and believe in them and give him a update on the out come when they do the surgery.

I just want my husband back happy and healthy.

REPLY
2 replies
Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Mar 25, 2019

That is such good news, @david33! You definitely can hold your head high and I look forward to your update after your husband's surgery.

REPLY
JK | @contentandwell | Mar 25, 2019
In reply to @david33 "Update, The doctor thinks it's his memory changing due to his shut and his doctor is..." + (show)
@david33

Update,
The doctor thinks it's his memory changing due to his shut and his doctor is going to try and fix it tomorrow. My therapist wants me to hold my head high and try and believe in them and give him a update on the out come when they do the surgery.

I just want my husband back happy and healthy.

Jump to this post

@david33. I hope that solves the problem, that it is a fixable, physical thing. I’m sure it will be a huge relief to have your husband back. I too will be looking forward to hearing results.
JK

REPLY
Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Apr 2, 2019
In reply to @david33 "Update, The doctor thinks it's his memory changing due to his shut and his doctor is..." + (show)
@david33

Update,
The doctor thinks it's his memory changing due to his shut and his doctor is going to try and fix it tomorrow. My therapist wants me to hold my head high and try and believe in them and give him a update on the out come when they do the surgery.

I just want my husband back happy and healthy.

Jump to this post

@david33 Hello Laura,

I was just thinking about you and your husband. Has the surgery on his shunt been scheduled yet?

If you are comfortable doing so, will you provide an update as to how he (and you) are doing?

REPLY
View MoreView Less
Please sign in or register to post a reply.