I am one of those caregivers who is taking care of a household and my husband who is 17 yrs. older than me while he suffers from dementia at age 95 now. Before this, I had the privilege of seeing my mother thru to 99 yrs. The years have flown by and now I find my own health in a scary position as I am looking at serious surgery with a fusion of L4-L5. I am weighing and discussing what is possible for me as I live so far from my daughter who has stepped up to offer care giving services to both me and my husband until the time I get back on my feet. 6 weeks to two months? That would mean a temporary move to her house which I do not want to do but she wants to keep working at her part time job at an assisted living facility. It is a 3 + hour drive one way to their home from mine. Life seems to be a series of life changing decisions and we try to come to the best solution for those involved. I have pain meds at the moment that help me get thru each day but that is not living. I feel like everything else is on hold until I get the source of the pain taken care of. I will be losing sleep until we have made that decision. Even with surgery, there are no guarantees since my spine is a mess. Meantime, I will be getting a bone density test to see if I can be a candidate for surgery. I then, will need to choose a neurosurgeon in her area, if I decide to go to her home to receive the care she offers. Nursing home insurance would have been nice if one started it at a young age and paid for it over the years but yes, it is not something we feel the need for when we are young, and , for us,waiting until we are elderly only makes it too costly and out of our reach financially. Like cmael, I would like my husband to be able to live out his life in the home we both love. Now I just need to make the right decisions for us. I am thankful for all the advice, and support I get from those here and look forward to sharing when I can. Each day is precious and taking it one day at a time works for me.

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