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~ Depressed and scared, not making it financially ~

Mental Health | Last Active: Mar 19, 2022 | Replies (428)
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@amberpep

I have said this so many times, I'm sure you all are sick of it. I just can't envision myself living here til the end ..... I'm 75 right now and in great health, but I just hate it here. I've been looking for a part-time job, because money is tight-tight, and it would get me out. I so much wish I'd have stayed in MD in my condo. Everything I loved was there. It's 4 years now, and I still don't like it here and just hate the thought. I visited the senior center, but it seems more like the folks there should be in nursing homes (and I really don't mean that to be unkind) .... it's all bingo, cards, and various type of things like that. I guess I didn't know what I was expecting. I'll be moving to the Senior part of this complex, which is a small amount cheaper, quite small in size. I just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up. My girls live down here with their families and they're very sweet, but ..... my X-husband also lives down here too. What a mistake I made when I left MD. I'm sorry I keep bringing this upl
abby

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Replies to "I have said this so many times, I'm sure you all are sick of it. I..."
Jim, Volunteer Mentor | @jimhd | May 23, 2020

@amberpep

I'm really sorry that you haven't been able to find your place in Virginia. I know what living below the poverty level is like. Not fun. Has your son talked with you about moving back home to MD? It sounds like you're pretty close to him. Family can be really supportive. So many families are torn apart, but you're blessed to have a son and daughters who care about you.

Do you have a date for the move to the senior apartment?

If you could do what you want to do, go where you want to go, what would that look like? Maybe it's just a dream right now, but the possibility of fulfilling your dreams is there. Remember "To dream the impossible dream"?

Waking up in Heaven is one of my dreams. I suppose it's not unusual for those of us who live with depression to have those thoughts. For now, I make a promise to myself that I won't do anything to make that happen for a week, or until my daughter and her husband and their 3 year old and 9 month old daughters come to visit this summer. It's been a helpful system that I use to keep going.

Right now, where I'm going is to bed. Have a restful weekend, Abby. Thank you for being a member of my Mayo Connect family.

Jim

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marjou | @marjou | May 23, 2020

Hi Abby, It's difficult to think of positive things when one is depressed and financial strapped. It's good that you share by posting here. For now it's a good thing that you've got a place to live although not ideal but until you can make change/move. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

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