@dianrib You will get her back again it,'ll take a village we are part of that. But you,'ll have to help yourself by seeing your Dr first .
Don't hold back from him/her that way they,'ll know how to help you

@dianrib Like the others have said, you are going through so much. Stress and missing your long time partner can cause medications to not work the same as they were. I hope that you can be seen by your Dr soon. Are you keeping a journal to write down what you feel, or how things are triggering for you? That will be helpful not only for you, but for the Dr. Do you have a trusted friend or family member who you can lean on face-to-face? We are here around the cyber table for you. Sending hugs of support,
Ginger