@hgarm- I hear you say this again and again and I'm so sorry for not being able to offer more. You feel that you are losing your fight so you need to take control and do something about it in an agressive way. You are strong and intelligent so call one of your doctor's and tell them that it's imperative that you are seen, if you won't go to the ER.
I'm not a doctor and neither is @hopeful33250. I'm afraid it's in your hands now. Please let us know what you decide to do. I care very much about your agony. What does your husband recommend?