1. < Just Want to Talk

How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

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2011panc | @2011panc | Jan 25, 2020

Why is there only one Yogi Bear? Because when God tried to make another it turned out to be Boo Boo.

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2011panc | @2011panc | Jan 27, 2020

Why do we have belly buttons? Because when we are done and being taken out of the oven God pokes us each in the tummy and says, "That one's done, that one's done . . . "

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janemichele | @janemichele | Jan 27, 2020
In reply to @jakedduck1 "One dark night in Dublin a fire started inside the local chemical plant. In a blink..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

One dark night in Dublin a fire started inside the local chemical plant.
In a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.

When the fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fireman in charge and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the centre of the plant. They must be saved. I will give 50,000 euro to the fire department that brings them out intact.”

But the roaring flames held the fire-fighters off.

Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now 100,000 euro to the fire station who could bring out the company’s secret files.

But still the fire fighters could not get through.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby rural township volunteer fire brigade, composed mainly of old men over 65. To everyone’s amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant. Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno.

Outside, the other firemen watched as the old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire and fought it back on all sides.

It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas.

The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to 200,000 euro and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.

The local TV station caught the thank you on film and asked the chief, “What are you going to do with all that money?”

“Well,” said Paddy, the 70-year-old fire chief, “the first thing we’re gonna do is fix the brakes on that bloody fire truck.”
Jake

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Very cute. Thanks for sharing. I'm still smiling.

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JK | @contentandwell | Jan 28, 2020

I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this.
JK
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3 replies
marvinjsturing | @marvinjsturing | Jan 28, 2020
In reply to @contentandwell "I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this. JK" + (show)
@contentandwell

I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this.
JK

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@contentandwell Thanks for posting these. Puns are some of my favorites. Some of these are 2/3 of a pun - PU_

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imallears | @imallears | Jan 28, 2020
In reply to @contentandwell "I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this. JK" + (show)
@contentandwell

I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this.
JK

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@contentandwell

I love these...have to memorize a few for my repertoire.

FL Mary

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Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Jan 28, 2020

Thanks everyone I enjoyed those!!!
Jake

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lioness | @lioness | Jan 28, 2020
In reply to @contentandwell "I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this. JK" + (show)
@contentandwell

I don't usually put things in this group but I couldn't resist this.
JK

Jump to this post

@contentandwell I like be puns I'm going to keep these as I'm gathering jokes and puns for this year's Thanksgivings Talent show Thanks

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2011panc | @2011panc | Jan 29, 2020

A Haiku
My toe was hurting
A tractor trailer hit me
Now all over hurts.

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2011panc | @2011panc | Feb 4, 2020

My favorite Super Bowl commercial: They are playing football. A flag is thrown. Everyone looks around. A rumble is heard. A pack of cars break down the wall and drive across the field. It is Daytona time!

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