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Down in the dumps again – challenges with adult children
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Feb 18, 2019 | Replies (357)Comment receiving replies
A pill and prayer are not going to make your children and grandchildren reunite with you. Read the post above and get out and get involved in LIFE. As hard as it might be at first...do for others. Volunteer. Enrich your life with activities. You want to be considered a positive ray of sunshine in the lives of your family and others. Take it one step at a time with your children and offer to babysit or go for a coffee and bring little gifts or their favourite dessert from childhood. People want to be around those who are not mopey, passive and needy. Be strong and independent. Smile! And this way you will be an influence on them as they might be depressed.
I am a senior and I attend 2 Italian classes per week (I am not Italian) and one German class (I am not German.). I volunteer for 4 organizations. I cook soups for my 80+ sister in law who is not well. I am organizing old family videos and photos. I get out and do photography on occasion. I try to travel somewhere once a year. I send a young, African asylum seeker to English school and I help him find his way in this new, scary world for him. I babysit my granddaughter and cook dishes they like when I have time. I could go on and on. Bottom line: Get involved in life and make yourself interesting. And be cheerful and positive. Good luck!
Replies to "A pill and prayer are not going to make your children and grandchildren reunite with you...."
@afrobin Great post. I share your attitude 100%. As Andy Dufresne said in the Shawshank Redemption, we can "get busy living or get busy dying." It's certainly easier to "get busy living" when we're healthy, but even unhealthy people have the choice. If we intentionally look for the good in people/things and go out of our way to improve ourselves, we have a much better opportunity to be happy. To me, the key is to be intentional about it, to work at it. As the old saying goes, it's, "making lemonade out of lemons." Not always easy to do, but circling back to this attitude when life throws us lemons, I find that I'm a happier person, and as a result, I'm much more pleasant to be around.
Even though I cannot get out and do the things I hear others share about I do my best to be a little sunshine when I get the opportunity. I do struggle with physical and mental issues. We are all different with varying capabilities which could be considered wallowing in our shortcomings. I endeavor not to do so and be content with what I can do.
@afrobin- Clearly I should have read on to your next post before posting mine. It sounds like you are very much out there doing, being involved, etc. I still have a problem with your word choice burden, but prehaps I misunderstand your meaning of it. I will make the effort to read on the next time. Jim @thankful
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I appreciate your reply. But the last thing I am is mopey. I don’t let my family see that I’m sad. I always put on a happy face. I’m very involved in our church, I volunteer at Hospice, and I feed and work with the homeless twice a month. I babysit my grandson 5 days a week and have my granddaughters over often. I’m not disconnected from kids at all. I simply wanted a thank you and a how are you feeling once in awhile. I see my oldest daughter at least 5 days a week and see my youngest 1-2 times per week and she calls daily to talk about her life. I also take care of my mom daily who has dementia. I’m very involved in life but depression doesn’t just go away because I walk outside. I’m glad you have found what works for you. I do believe greatly in the power of prayer and I do think that medication can be of great help. Evidently mine needs an adjustment.