Facing Cancer Recurrence, PTSD & Acknowledging Mental Health
It's extremely difficult to face the fact of recurring cancers. After treatments we try and get away from it all and live our life. Then along comes another CT scan or PET scan and POW, you have to face another cancer. My reaction was developing PTSD.
You can read what I wrote in my blog: https://my20yearscancer.com/blog/
How do we cope? How do we react? What do we do?
How have you all reacted to another cancer? Or the possibility of another one? Has your "already compromised" mental health been able to deal with it? How? Or not?
Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Cancer: Managing Symptoms Support Group.
@sparklegram, thank you. Please let me know how you are feeling and good luck to you.
@merpreb Thank you for the above response. It does help. I am learning to take things a day at a time--really. What an upcoming T scan says this coming June is nothing I can control, so I try to just let it go--sort fo like putting it into a blood and proof off it goes. it isn't easy. Also, I recently found out that there is shame connected with lung cancer--at lest fro me. I was a smoker--smoke from age 18 until 45. I smoke at least two packs a day. Gave it up and felt a whole lot better. When I tell someone about my lung cancer and surgery, I sense a feeling of shame. It really doesn't make sense. However, knowing what I do about psychology, I can see where a lot of this would have come from past childhood indoctrination with being shamed. I will deal with this and will seek professional help for this. I'm by nature a loner, but do try and get out. Must MAKE myself go out more and socialize--church at least. Anyway, I read and reread your post and find it really uplifting and helpful. Thank you.
Don't know if I thanked you, but the tape is helping. One of m incisions is right under my breast hen a car goes. Dang it hurt. When I can I go braless, otherwise the gentle bra seems to be helping. I'll try in a few months the Hanes Smooth Comfort bra. I like your idea of flannel shirts inside out, but here in Texas it is too hot for flannel now. I'm thinking it might be good to get some camisole with built in shelf bras and wear cotton or similar shirts over them. Thank you. You have really helped.
@alamogal635 - I'm with you on the guilt and shame. In my blog I go into it. It might help you. https://my20yearscancer.com/conversations-about-lung-cancer/
When someone asks if you smoked or tries to shame you walk away. Or ask them why they asked. I even told my Vet that her comment was mean because it shamed me and I could very well feel guilty by myself. No one should put anyone down, for anything.
That being said, have a great day. There are many reasons to feel guilty this is anew day so let's think of flowers! They at least don't sass people!
@trixie1313 I do not know of any Mindfulness Meditation group/classes in my area. I do listen to meditation CDs & found some great restful meditation exercises on UTube.
@lady1lake, That is a good suggestion for @trixie1313. YouTube has a lot of meditation exercises (even some for kids). Here is a link to several different meditation/mindfulness exercises, https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=meditation+and+mindfulness+exercises.
@hopeful33250 thank you for posting the links. The meditation exercises are a great way to relax & worry less.
@merpreb Yesterday had my fist visit with my dear oncologist. he is a compassionate man and knows his field well. I was fully expecting him too say that he would do a CT scan in three months, then six months, etc. That is what I had read int he literature. He has suggested that the cancer found in my right lunch was so small and had not spread to tissue, or lymph nodes that I return for a CT scan kn 6 months, then if all is well a year, then 5 years. I was surprised and happy. Typical of me, after the fact I started to worry that maybe that is not soon enough. I trust my doctor and he's worked with a lot of this type of cancer as well as others. He is very pleased with the surgery and my recovery.I am too. Trust is difficult for me as I"ve mentioned in other posts. Just thought I'd put this out here. I feel good about his report, but still worried that maybe for some reason, I'm not important enough, or he's kind of taking this too lightly. I know rationally he isn't, but these doubts are trying to ruin his positive prognosis and my hopes for a good outcome. Just wanted to share this and see what others have to say. Thank you for letting me state my irrational doubts.
@alamogal635- I'd like to say stop this but I know your history about trust. How about making a list of the pros and cons of what the problems are in your thinking? The CT scan results are wonderful! Congratulations! After my first lobectomy I was told that there wasn't any chemo for me. I felt just the same way! OMG I was really upset about it. I didn't feel complete. Had I known then what I know now I should have been thrilled. I wanted chemo, to be like "everyone else" lol
Trust your doctor! Even if you can't. He He took out your cancer so that you would live and have a great life. Why would he turn around and want you to have more tests when you don't need any? Doctors aren't necessarily going by the every 3 months and then 6 and then year anymore.
Please don't lose sleep over this unless your health changes! Does anyone else have feelings like this?
@merpreb Thank you for your response. It is quite helpful. I do feel good about things today and the shadow of doubt seems to have receded. Maybe it just was good to getup and do something fun for myself for once. I don't mean seeing doctors, or going to the grocery store, but simply having my hair done. If I can figure out how, I'l post a picture so you all can see what I look like. Really, being social helps and will have a busy day of that tomorrow as well. I trust my doctors and will as the old saying go "let go and let God." Thank you again.