I am sorry for your loss. My husband of 17 years passed away 12/5/18. That may not seem like a long marriage but it was a lifetime for us. We were never apart except for work and could not wit until we got home in the evening to talk about the day. We were blessed with a very good life. But now my heart is broken and I cant seem to function. People say it will be fine you'll be ok but the pain is unbearable. I think I want to be alone and then I am so lonely but do nothing but cry when I'm around other people. The hurt will never go away.