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← Return to The Journey of Grieving
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Loss & Grief | Last Active: Mar 1, 2020 | Replies (111)
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Hi, @maddiec, and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. Thank you for sharing some of the things that have helped you in this grieving process, like socializing with friends and family, and trying to keep busy.
You mentioned grieving since your husband's diagnosis since 2016, and that he passed away in 2018. I'm guessing others have also had the experience of grieving before a loved one passed away. I'm wondering if you would share a bit more about what that was like learning about his diagnosis of pancreatic cancer?
Replies to "Hi, @maddiec, and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I'm very sorry to hear about the loss..."
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When my husband was diagnosed in September of 2016 it was if a train just plowed through our lives...from that day forward, his, mine, and our children and grandchildren's lives were forever changed...He was told it was not curable, but treatable..we knew he was terminal but he fought as if he had a curable disease...the doctors just looked at him in amazement...he was an inspiration to all who knew him..not only did he have cancer, but end stage kidney disease, 40 year diabetic and heart disease..he lasted two years, and thankfully no pain...No matter how much you prepare, you are never prepared for the end..
I journal everyday since his diagnosis and I am in a support group for loss of spouse..I highly recommend that..I didn't think I needed it...I do!
I am moving forward everyday, and doing everything I can to heal but try to keep my deepest grief to moments, not days...
We are stronger than we sometimes give ourselves credit...but we must have patience for the process..
We were together 45 years..this will not happen overnight for sure...