I guess I just answered my own question. I'm struggling so much with the loss of my mom, who died suddenly on November 14th. She was 82, full of faith, and didn't suffer, so everyone is telling me it was a "good death" as those things go. But I am devastated. And I woke up from a dream this morning where someone had just told me of her death anew, and I had just been about to call her about something, and it all hit me as if I hadn't known about it for a month and a half, but had just learned of it. It's been a very rough day.