Thank you for your kind response Teresa. I've never had a good opinion of myself, from childhood, through marriage. That was emphasized to me when pre-divorce I did get my now-X to a counselor with me ..... we went a brief time, and one time the therapist asked us to say a few good things about each other. I really didn't have any trouble, because although he is an N, he does have good qualities. When the therapist asked him about my good qualities, my X sat and thought awhile, and finally said, "she's a good mother." (I'm not minimizing that, I worked very hard to raise solid, grounded kids) The therapist then said, "and?" That was all my X could think of. That was the end .... I knew what he thought of me, and I was done. After 3 years of struggling to repair our marriage, and 40 years being married, that's all he could say. The next day I moved out.
abby