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It is hard to ask for help. I have always been seen as independent and not needing assistance. I had lower bowel surgery a while back and with 36 stitches in my belly, couldn't move very well. I had two daughters in town and over a 30 day period, they didn't see me once. Saw me in the hospital though. I lived alone in an apartment. If it wasn't for meals on wheels, I wouldn't have eaten much. Could barely walk. Did I call them and ask for help? No. Dumb and stubborn, I guess. I am due surgery to take out the bladder, prostate, and lower bowel in a couple of months. At least now I have a girlfriend to be with me even though she has her health issues. I am 71 and she is 75. I have since moved and now am in town with a brother and two sisters. They say call if I need anything but really? I am told with the new surgery, I wouldn't be able to lift more than 10# and not be able to put on my socks myself. 10# is just shy of a gallon of milk. Can't carry a suitcase or bag of groceries. Dumb them down to less than 10# I guess. No lawn mowing or snow shoveling. Hire neighbor to help? Maybe. Will see and just go a day at a time when the surgery happens. This is an issue.
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Hello @hodagwi Sorry to hear of your past and coming health challenges! I agree with you. It is often hard for us to ask for help -- and I may be wrong here, but often especially hard for us men. That said, I had to overcome that when I had spinal surgery and then while I was my wife's caregiver during her war with brain cancer. There come those times when we simply cannot manage to do something physically or emotionally, and help must be summoned!
You are lucky that you have siblings who offer to help if you call --- so my free advice is to take them up on their offer and explain ahead of time what your limitations will be and how they might be able to help with groceries, perhaps a car ride to/from someplace, etc. One of my biggest issues at the time of my surgery was fall leaves and it was very hard to find someone late in the game, so it may be helpful to line up those paid assistants early on!
Just my two cents plain and based on one old foggy's experiences.
Strength, courage, and peace!