Losing hope

Posted by barnowl53 @barnowl53, Sep 5, 2018

I've been depressed since my 20s (am in my mid-60s now). A year ago I took a nosedive and became anxious as well as much more deeply depressed. Everything scares me - even something as mundane as taking my car through the car wash. I used to read and listen to music all the time. Now I haven't read or listened to anything in a year. I've been in outpatient groups and on a number of medicines - the latest group is buspar, anafranil, Seroquel, klonopin, lamictal and Viibryd (I'm weaning off that). Every once in a while - say, once a week - I feel OK, the way I used to when I was moderately depressed. The rest of the time is just unbearable. What's next? Transcranial magnetic stimulation? ECT? Thank you for listening.

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Hello @barnowl53 ...... after I read your posting, I had to reply. I can empathize with you, I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist/psychopharmacologist for 22 years. I have tried around 20 different meds and combinations. They start out working, then peter out, now I’m on trintellix. So far, so good. Please don’t give up! You are a worthwhile human being! There are others like you. You are definitely not alone!

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Hello @barnowl53, @karen00! I am a volunteer mentor on Connect and wanted to mention something I have recently done with my psychiatrist. I had a DNA/gene analysis from a few cheek swab cells. I don't fully understand the results, but they helped my psych get me on the medicine that I should respond to better than other antipsychotics. I have chronic pancreatitis and besides pancreatic insufficiency, I primarily suffer debilitating pain and only opiates even take the edge off. I have been on synthetic morphine - extended-release and breakthrough - for over a dozen years now. I had generalized anxiety disorder and after a few years of the pain and opioids was dx'ed with severe depressive disorder. I have been through extremely dark periods and more moderate periods. I have never gotten any great degree of relief from the many antipsychotics I have tried, but armed with the information from the gene analysis, I am now on Nuvigil and Prestiq, along with Remeron for sleep. We also learned that I have a MHTFR mutation which causes one to not produce an enzyme needed for serotonin production/absorption. For that, I take an over the counter supplement called L-Methylfolate. The body should convert folic acid or folate into this substance and that enhances my body's use of serotonin. One other thing revealed was that I am a very fast metabolizer of medicines which means I need higher doses to be therapeutic. The past 4-5 months have been very difficult physically and would have typically put me in a downward spiral to deep depression, but so far, it has not. I am getting a bit frustrated with the situation, but not terribly depressed.

I wish you relief from this horrible disease,
Gary

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@gman007

Hello @barnowl53, @karen00! I am a volunteer mentor on Connect and wanted to mention something I have recently done with my psychiatrist. I had a DNA/gene analysis from a few cheek swab cells. I don't fully understand the results, but they helped my psych get me on the medicine that I should respond to better than other antipsychotics. I have chronic pancreatitis and besides pancreatic insufficiency, I primarily suffer debilitating pain and only opiates even take the edge off. I have been on synthetic morphine - extended-release and breakthrough - for over a dozen years now. I had generalized anxiety disorder and after a few years of the pain and opioids was dx'ed with severe depressive disorder. I have been through extremely dark periods and more moderate periods. I have never gotten any great degree of relief from the many antipsychotics I have tried, but armed with the information from the gene analysis, I am now on Nuvigil and Prestiq, along with Remeron for sleep. We also learned that I have a MHTFR mutation which causes one to not produce an enzyme needed for serotonin production/absorption. For that, I take an over the counter supplement called L-Methylfolate. The body should convert folic acid or folate into this substance and that enhances my body's use of serotonin. One other thing revealed was that I am a very fast metabolizer of medicines which means I need higher doses to be therapeutic. The past 4-5 months have been very difficult physically and would have typically put me in a downward spiral to deep depression, but so far, it has not. I am getting a bit frustrated with the situation, but not terribly depressed.

I wish you relief from this horrible disease,
Gary

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Hi Gary, thanks so much for the info! I am going to talk to my dr about DNA testing at the next appointment. Appreciate it!

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@barnowl53 @karen00 I too am a Volunteer Mentor, and I concur with gman's recommendation to have a DNA test to check for the most effective antidepressant/antipsychotic medications for you. I will be requesting this test at my next doctor's appointment. Thank you @gman007 for the additional information about the L-Methylfolate supplement. I will talk with my doctor about it. I'm hoping for a healthier and happier life as we all age.

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@karen00

Hi Gary, thanks so much for the info! I am going to talk to my dr about DNA testing at the next appointment. Appreciate it!

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Definitely check with your insurance to see if the DNA testing is covered. I had it done a month ago and just received my EOB from my insurance yesterday. I was flabbergasted at how much the test cost-$14,000! Yes you read it correctly $14,000. I don’t have my results back but will get them next week. For that amount of money they better be good!

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@gman007

Hello @barnowl53, @karen00! I am a volunteer mentor on Connect and wanted to mention something I have recently done with my psychiatrist. I had a DNA/gene analysis from a few cheek swab cells. I don't fully understand the results, but they helped my psych get me on the medicine that I should respond to better than other antipsychotics. I have chronic pancreatitis and besides pancreatic insufficiency, I primarily suffer debilitating pain and only opiates even take the edge off. I have been on synthetic morphine - extended-release and breakthrough - for over a dozen years now. I had generalized anxiety disorder and after a few years of the pain and opioids was dx'ed with severe depressive disorder. I have been through extremely dark periods and more moderate periods. I have never gotten any great degree of relief from the many antipsychotics I have tried, but armed with the information from the gene analysis, I am now on Nuvigil and Prestiq, along with Remeron for sleep. We also learned that I have a MHTFR mutation which causes one to not produce an enzyme needed for serotonin production/absorption. For that, I take an over the counter supplement called L-Methylfolate. The body should convert folic acid or folate into this substance and that enhances my body's use of serotonin. One other thing revealed was that I am a very fast metabolizer of medicines which means I need higher doses to be therapeutic. The past 4-5 months have been very difficult physically and would have typically put me in a downward spiral to deep depression, but so far, it has not. I am getting a bit frustrated with the situation, but not terribly depressed.

I wish you relief from this horrible disease,
Gary

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Hi Gary
I saw that you’re on Remeron, I’m currently taking it too. Have you had any issues with weight gain? I’ve gained about 15-20 pounds.

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Hi kdo827
I do not know where you live but for anyone who can access CAMH (Canadian Association for Mental Health) in Toronto, Canada, they are doing a huge study on genetic testing at no cost to the person taking the test . If you google Impact Study at CAMH Toronto you will find the details. They plan to do 20,000 people ( ithink they have done over 6,000 so far). I do not know if they will do people from outside Canada.
Best wishes
Ainsleigh

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Thanks for sharing that with me. I’ve already had my DNA testing done. Fortunately my psychiatrist told me that I’d

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@kdo0827

Thanks for sharing that with me. I’ve already had my DNA testing done. Fortunately my psychiatrist told me that I’d

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Only be responsible for what my insurance company would pay. I was shocked when I saw how expensive the test was.

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To the various posts and questions; The total bill for what my Psych had done for me was about $300 if my insurance had not picked it up and she advised me not to pay them anything as she had never had a patient have to pay. I don't know that what I had was a full blown DNA test/gene map, but it was appropriate for our needs. As for Remeron, I don't think it led to weight gain. My weight fluctuates greatly as a result of inflammation, bloat, a balky digestive system, etc...Ten pound swings over 2-3 days in either direction are pretty common and when I average scale readings over a couple of weeks, I am down about 30# over the past year, but I have been taking the remeron for much longer. Most of my loss is attributable to severe nausea over the past 5 months.
Peace to all,
Gary

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