1. < Cancer: Managing Symptoms

Coping with anxiety while waiting

Posted by ventibug @ventibug, May 29, 2018

I would welcome the suggestions of others for strategies for coping with anxiety while awaiting the next whatever. CT scans have never given me good news; I look forward to being surprised with good news after cycle 2 of chemo, when team takes the next look. Currently on a 2 week break from chemo due to the need for time to heal wound infection. Sent photos of healing progress to oncologist. I pretty much had it together that he would recommend another week of healing. He recommended 2 more weeks. Since Ive already had a recurrence (last CT news), i am worried my cancer is growing while I wait to be able to resume chemo. I dont disagree with the plan. My inquiry is how to cope with the anxiety? Things that work for me sometimes: knitting; getting lost in a good book; joking with friends; playing with my dogs; praying. Ordered Dr Amit Sood's book today (thank you, llwortman) to improve mindfulness skills. All suggestions humbly appreciated, Ventibug

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | May 31, 2018

Hello @stellgma

I am glad that you are sharing your upcoming surgery with us. Your anxiety is perfectly understandable! Any of us would be anxious if we were in your shoes. Sometimes talking about our fears can be helpful.

Can you tell us a little about the type of brain surgery you will be having? Have you been told what to expect and what your recovery time will be? Please share with us as you feel comfortable doing so.

Teresa

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barbphillips | @barbphillips | May 31, 2018

I do alot of deep breathing and focus on the breath. This relaxes me and sometimes gives me Peace. I’ve stipped resisting anxiety as resisting made my anxiety worse. Hope this makes a difference.

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mpeters | @mpeters | May 31, 2018
In reply to @cweeks18 "HI TERESA, MY NAME IS CHUCK, I AM A SAILOR AND NOT SMART WITH WORDS, IE,ANXIOUS..." + (show)
@cweeks18

HI TERESA, MY NAME IS CHUCK, I AM A SAILOR AND NOT SMART WITH WORDS, IE,ANXIOUS , WHEN OUT A SEA, I AM ANXIOUS TO GET HOME. BUT I DONT LIKE ANY THING ABOUT MY CANCER. BBUUT I SURE LIKE GETTING HOME. RESP. CHUCK.

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I took a class that was offered at Mayo that helped me a lot. I will highlight two ideas. The first was to designate a place in your house to feel calm. It can be a room or a chair. If knitting, praying or drumming makes you feel calm, do it there. Don’t open bills or other anxiety provoking things there. The second was to enjoy nature and see yourself in the perspective of the cosmos. Having said that, I am still anxious about my upcoming appointment with the urologist. To manage it I’m spending time with my friends, doing my favorite hobbies, exercising, and eating a good diet. Plus doing the two things I outlined.

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | May 31, 2018
In reply to @cweeks18 "HI TERESA, MY NAME IS CHUCK, I AM A SAILOR AND NOT SMART WITH WORDS, IE,ANXIOUS..." + (show)
@cweeks18

HI TERESA, MY NAME IS CHUCK, I AM A SAILOR AND NOT SMART WITH WORDS, IE,ANXIOUS , WHEN OUT A SEA, I AM ANXIOUS TO GET HOME. BUT I DONT LIKE ANY THING ABOUT MY CANCER. BBUUT I SURE LIKE GETTING HOME. RESP. CHUCK.

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@mpeters What great suggestions! Thanks for sharing these with us.

Teresa

REPLY
Maxine | @maxaz1 | Jun 1, 2018

This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We were horrified, and we spent the next 2-3 years waiting...Waiting for the next bad thing. We watched and waited for symptoms to develop. We interpreted every little twitch as the beginning of the end. We were in full panic mode, anticipating and dreading the worst possible developments. It took us that long to learn to cope with the fear, the depression, the anxiety...until we finally understood that the advice and care the doctors were giving us was empowering - allowing us to live our lives with the best possible outcomes. Note that I speak as though we both got that diagnosis....After being married to this guy for 38 years, that's what it feels like. Our best days have come from enjoying our family, being together doing the daily activities of life - as well as we can, as much as we can, we talk about the symptoms that have developed - to the doctor, to our family, to each other. Shame and embarrassment and dread no longer control our daily life. Small pleasures are the best!

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6 replies
ventibug | @ventibug | Jun 1, 2018
In reply to @maxaz1 "This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We..." + (show)
@maxaz1

This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We were horrified, and we spent the next 2-3 years waiting...Waiting for the next bad thing. We watched and waited for symptoms to develop. We interpreted every little twitch as the beginning of the end. We were in full panic mode, anticipating and dreading the worst possible developments. It took us that long to learn to cope with the fear, the depression, the anxiety...until we finally understood that the advice and care the doctors were giving us was empowering - allowing us to live our lives with the best possible outcomes. Note that I speak as though we both got that diagnosis....After being married to this guy for 38 years, that's what it feels like. Our best days have come from enjoying our family, being together doing the daily activities of life - as well as we can, as much as we can, we talk about the symptoms that have developed - to the doctor, to our family, to each other. Shame and embarrassment and dread no longer control our daily life. Small pleasures are the best!

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Very helpful. Thank you.

REPLY
Maxine | @maxaz1 | Jun 1, 2018
In reply to @maxaz1 "This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We..." + (show)
@maxaz1

This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We were horrified, and we spent the next 2-3 years waiting...Waiting for the next bad thing. We watched and waited for symptoms to develop. We interpreted every little twitch as the beginning of the end. We were in full panic mode, anticipating and dreading the worst possible developments. It took us that long to learn to cope with the fear, the depression, the anxiety...until we finally understood that the advice and care the doctors were giving us was empowering - allowing us to live our lives with the best possible outcomes. Note that I speak as though we both got that diagnosis....After being married to this guy for 38 years, that's what it feels like. Our best days have come from enjoying our family, being together doing the daily activities of life - as well as we can, as much as we can, we talk about the symptoms that have developed - to the doctor, to our family, to each other. Shame and embarrassment and dread no longer control our daily life. Small pleasures are the best!

Jump to this post

Adding to my post....Make no mistake. We have our moments of fear and depression and days where we, individually or both, take our long naps to escape the reality of difficulties of daily life. But knowing that we can recover from a pessimistic outlook, and that there is a lot of life to still be lived, helps a lot.

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Jun 1, 2018
In reply to @maxaz1 "This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We..." + (show)
@maxaz1

This is a great topic.... 6 years ago my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. We were horrified, and we spent the next 2-3 years waiting...Waiting for the next bad thing. We watched and waited for symptoms to develop. We interpreted every little twitch as the beginning of the end. We were in full panic mode, anticipating and dreading the worst possible developments. It took us that long to learn to cope with the fear, the depression, the anxiety...until we finally understood that the advice and care the doctors were giving us was empowering - allowing us to live our lives with the best possible outcomes. Note that I speak as though we both got that diagnosis....After being married to this guy for 38 years, that's what it feels like. Our best days have come from enjoying our family, being together doing the daily activities of life - as well as we can, as much as we can, we talk about the symptoms that have developed - to the doctor, to our family, to each other. Shame and embarrassment and dread no longer control our daily life. Small pleasures are the best!

Jump to this post

@maxaz1

Thank you for sharing your new found approach to waiting! It sounds like a healthy transition to this "new normal." By the way, your picture is just great - you both look very content and happy.

Teresa

REPLY
brown1 | @brown1 | Jun 2, 2018

L
LL had pain in my head,and had to go to er. they said I have brAIN CANCER. i HAVE TO WAIT 6-7 WEEKS TO SEE A DR. iS THIS NORMAL

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2 replies
ginpene | @ginpene05 | Jun 2, 2018
In reply to @brown1 "L LL had pain in my head,and had to go to er. they said I have..." + (show)
@brown1

L
LL had pain in my head,and had to go to er. they said I have brAIN CANCER. i HAVE TO WAIT 6-7 WEEKS TO SEE A DR. iS THIS NORMAL

Jump to this post

when I was told I had to wait 3 wk I called the patient advocate in the hospital and was in in a wk. Insist politely. Good luck!

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