Hi, @theotherone -- Really glad that you decided to join us here. I think you will find many wonderful members in this community. Sounds like you've had some terribly hard life experiences. A few members who come to mind when you talk about a childhood background of abuse are: @amberpep, @parus, @pendragonart, @peach414144 and @vsinn2000. I believe they may have something to share.

You mentioned sometimes fears you have are reflected when you do things like talk to others or go shopping. I'm wondering if you could tell us more about that?