Thank you for the welcome @hopeful33250. I have had several losses but the most damaging was my fathers death. After that the family stopped communicating and now I feel like I have lost them all. So now Christmas is my family and I try to get into the swing of it, but it seems like a chore. I do my best to put on a good front, but it just isn't the same. I try to keep myself so busy I can't get to down.