@seeker70 I can relate to your depression. I also had it since I was a kid and now a senior. It is mild sometimes but mostly it stand its ugly head out and it keeps me from enjoying most things. I recently told a friend I was depressed again and don't know why. I want to be happy and enjoy life. I want the joy most people feel and live. When I was younger I would work long hours so my mind would stay busy on work instead of depression. Now that I am older I realized I was only hurting my children because I was engulfed in work and too busy to be with them. The guilt and worry that comes along with depression is terrible. Prayers for all of you. I hope we all beat this thing once and for all. Wanda