@murkywaters My husband was verbally abusive and I was told two important things. First, they treat their spouses or primary caregivers the worst because you are their stable person and you won't desert them. Secondly, it is not okay to just accept this, so keep reporting it until something helps. My husband saw a Neuropsychologist and it took a few tries, but he became appreciative and is much nicer. He still thinks it's all about him, doesn't want to wait for anything, but when it isn't going his way the anger isn't directed at me, he just becomes sad or grumpy. It was a hard road getting there, though. He agreed to go to this doctor to address sleep, and she proceeded from there. Hugs and best wishes to you!