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Hi, @halenbon81. Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I can hear your pain in your post. Deep, deep depression can be debilitating. I am glad you are in the care of doctors.
If you are concerned about getting better, have you considered different care? This might mean looking at a second or third opinion from different doctors. You mentioned you are grieving. What happened that caused you this grief?
Replies to "Hi, @halenbon81. Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. I can hear your pain in your post. Deep,..."
@lisalucier I'm sorry it's taking so long to message back I appreciate your message and it's very comforting there's been so much trauma in my life by hearing things and seeing things that a child should not I started drinking at 10:00 when I could get it to just numb it out and I think that's where my grief comes in is because I'm not feeling any better I feel like things will never get better but I still go to my doctors and I still try and I just hope that something will click. Thank you
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@lisalucier I saw and seen things that anyone should see much less a child at 9. My family new this and never addressed it with me so it's like it happened yesterday every day. I started drinking at 12or 13 which was a huge relief and escape which I wouldn't trade those days for anything. I've started a new treatment called MDR to address the trauma. I never thought about a second opinion about my mental health but maybe I should. I really like my psychiatrist. I will be honest it's hard to push on anymore but I have a great support team. Thank you so very much for talking to me