Help with cancer-related anxiety

#1- Ask God to guide you.
#2- Put your thoughts out there to a social media group where you have friends (make sure your filters are set for friends only). That helped me -almost a year ago, when I was diagnosed with Renal Cell Carcinoma AND the day after I got out of the hospital from a radical nephrectomy, was told my mammogram was abnormal (the clinic called while I was hospitalized but I was too sick to talk). Invasive Ductal Carcinoma x2; a tumor in each breast, stages I & II, respectively. Separate cancers.

My anxiety went thru the roof! I thought I was being punished.
Doc gave me pills but I tried once or twice and they didn't help.
I had gone through intensive chemo and pelvic radiation for Stage II Anal (-squamous cell carcinoma) in 2011. Yes, I have LT SE from that.
I had just bought a house (last year. The cancerous tumor-kidney, was discovered the day after I "closed" on the house.
Anyway, after a couple of months I just put it out there, on FB, as I know I have a LOT of friends, far and wide, who believe in prayer. For those who don't believe in God, they sent "positive vibes", which I happily accepted.
I did talk to a counselor, briefly, but the FB helped the most --and I don't post about my condition constantly....
#3- Take slow, deep breaths and say, "Fuck it! This is NOT going to ruin my day!"
(p.s. - I had a double mastectomy, w/o reconstruction, exactly three months after my Nephrectomy. I had complications with one drain constantly clotting, my surgeon retired 3 weeks after my surgery!!..unbeknownst to me, prior to surgery- and months of very painful bruising , adhesions "tightness"; same side the drain clotted. Oddly, the Stage I side. The left breast had a larger tumor plus a "suspicious" area, and I had had a large lumpectomy there in 2004, for microcalcifications; which hurt like he'll. No problems with THAT side...Anyway. the tightness is better now, after PT and nine months post surgery).
Hugs!

@carolp92 you are a soldier! God bless you! Thank you for sharing this. I thought I had a tough time, but you made it through the storm(s). I do these things too. I come here for support and talk to my friend who is an experienced LCSW. I ask God for guidance. I obsess in research. I go to yoga... and then I say "F**ck it!!! It's not going to ruin my day!"

*sigh*. This is surely a topic.

First, I'd like to say that I'm sorry you're having anxiety and PTSD symptoms. Just know that it can be a real-life byproduct of the cancer journey. I, too, was diagnosed about six years ago. . . December 2019. After chemo, surgery, and reconstructive surgery, I thought I was on my way. Then came an endometrial cancer diagnosis almost a year after my breast cancer surgery, and the wind seemed to leave my sails. Thankfully, there was no chemo, but "only" surgery. With my female organs all gone after that point, it was learning to live with life after a second diagnosis. Shortly after this, my daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer. Thankfully, she has completed her treatments and is now in remission. But talk about absolutely no wind to move your sails. . . what a challenging period that was for me and for my daughter.

I'm not sure I've even hit a period of feeling normal emotionally yet. . . . I garnered up enough courage to tell my provider I wasn't feeling myself after about two years into this journey, and she literally told me to "go out and enjoy the sunshine!" Defeated, I just kept trudging along. Months turned into years, and I am still wrestling with finding that emotional equilibrium for any length of time. I threw myself back into work, projects, family. . . and on the outside, I look quite normal. And sometimes, I even feel a hint of normalcy. . . and yet. . there can be a low-grade sadness or anxiousness that rears it's head on occasion and reminds me I'm still trying to breathe in and out. It's the residual reminder that my life was hanging in the balance for some time - both physically and emotionally.

I think life before cancer has this quality of the not-knowing . . . we don't feel that emotional strain because we haven't experienced what it feels like to live daily with this disease. But after we've once experienced it, we don't easily forget. Oh, the memories fade, and life has a way of encouraging us to get more fully involved again. . . but as one person noted on this thread, clinic or hospital visits can sometimes trigger a memory, an experience, an emotion. The task becomes to move through and overcome those triggers, and be okay about it.

I think how we manage that stress, move through it, and "be okay about it" can look a bit differently on each of us. I think, too, we can do a better job, as health care providers and patients, to communicate and truly listen to and respond to the needs presented. I didn't just need "sunshine" when I asked for help. . . I'd tried the sunshine and it wasn't working. What I needed was a professional listening ear (heart and mind) to help me walk through this season with a cane, so-to-speak, if only for a time. I can't help but think it may have eased things a bit for me then.

But this is now - and for the most part, my life has moved on. I should be extremely happy and grateful to be six years out from breast cancer. And I am! yet, it is the residuals that hang around, especially when I'm feeling tired, causing me to pause and feel that low-grade sadness and anxiety from time to time. I think there is sometimes an un-welcomed pressure that comes with the aftermath of cancer. . . . live well, be kind, make the most of your opportunities, bless others, be in great shape, smile and laugh more often. . . you know the list. . . it goes on forever. . . and we want to move through life with all those things. But maybe it's in the pauses, the moments we need to give ourselves some grace, and be okay with where we're at. Breathe in and out and just. be. okay.

I'm still learning to do this after moving through the trauma of cancer. And maybe it's lifelong. In any case, I know the Lord holds my life in both the ups and downs. I know that each day has enough trouble of its own, and I need only carry that day. I hope that in sharing my experience, someone else will feel a sense of normalcy to the emotional tremors that can sometimes threaten ever so-slightly in our daily. I think the body remembers, even when we want to forget. Being okay about that memory, and garnering up enough gumption and motivation to start in again can help. 🙂

Life. One trip through. Do my best! Big hugs to all of my breast-cancer Sisters. 🙂