@sabwal You are having a very complicated start to your medical journey. I can't comprehend how difficult it is to be staying with friends and not feel comfortable talking about your situation. I had the advantage of retreating until I figured out how I wanted to deal with my diagnosis.

I'm 2 years into this thing. My views have evolved over time. 2 years ago I was writing a much different sentiment. Time and experiences will change how you process this. Keep looking within yourself.

I write. That's not a natural talent but I find it helps me organize chaos and feel less anxious.

BTW I'm not from a wealthy family and I'm not wealthy now. The story was something I read and romanticized as a young woman of 17.