@tsch
It does take time. And it does take work. And work with a disinterested party is best. Often we confide only in those who are readily at hand, a relative or friend, but people who are close to us are disinclined to challenge our beliefs. We end up going in circles, which is the same as going nowhere. A counselor, or a group of strangers struggling under a similar burden, is usually more productive. I love it when I tell my counselor, "I believe such and such," only to have she say, "Why do you believe that?" and "What what makes you think it's true?" and "Is it possible to think of it another way?" I can't think of a relative or friend who would challenge me that way.

Cheers!
Ray (@ray666)