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Spouse behavior. Husband has inoperable grade 4 glioblastoma
Brain Tumor | Last Active: Sep 8 9:33am | Replies (27)Comment receiving replies
My husband died of inoperable GBM 17 months from diagnosis. We had excellent family support, thankfully. While I can’t imagine leaving him alone to face treatment, your son and DIL’s situation is very different. Unless they have major savings and investments, your DIL must become financially responsible for their finances and the son’s education. So I understand her working long hours if that is necessary. The camping trip is more confusing but perhaps the child wants and needs it.
I don’t understand her not being present for your son if he wants her there. However, you probably don’t know much about the inner workings of their marriage and now isn’t the time to dive in. Your role is to support your son and his family in whatever way he wants. Ask him. Be a listener not a talker.
GBM is so tough and typically terminal within 24 months, or less. They are going through hell right now so your role is to support, not question.
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@ruthannray I thought i had replied to your note, but i dontmsee it. Thank you for your comments. Insightful. You are correct on several fronts. Today, Labor Day, he is home alone. We spoke w/ his wife last night. She decided she and her son would sleep away last night so they could go to a labor day picnic, since he did not wish to go for whatever reasons. So he was alone last night and all day today. I guess im just old school. But enough of that. We'll be there next week and all of Oct to help,as best we can. Still trying to give here benefit of doubt. Again. Thanks commenting. I know you get it.
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@ruthannray good advice thank you. But I'm sharing in all of this is dialogue between me and my wife, And our two daughters. We're doing everything imaginable to support them both. It becomes admittedly more challenging when she does not answer her phone, respond to voicemails or to text messages. Despite our best efforts, which are certainly not perfect, we have offered to continue paying for your son's piano lessons, helping with bills, mowing the yard, buying groceries bringing over baked meals. And perhaps more important at all just sitting with them and being there. When we come over she leaves. All very perplexing.