Anxiety and Depression
I suffer from anxiety and depression. I'm on effexor er and seroquel. My mind is racing all the time and I constantly worry about everything. My mom has terminal cancer, so that doesn't help either. A lot of times I pretend to be happy, but I'm really not. I drive my mom to OSU for her cancer treatment when she has them. Since I do this, people feel like I shouldn't be on disability. They just don't understand what I go through. The only time I can sleep is when I take serquill . This makes me sleep, otherwise I cannot sleep at all. Any comments would be appreciated.
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@mckenzie
I'm so glad to get your post! As much as possible, Keep Moving!
Teresa
Hi. @mckenzie
I know how hard it is to be alone, especially when you don't feel well. I've been there.
Joining this group is one positive step you've made to reach out. The people here are good people, kind and understanding, and ready to walk alongside you.
Would you like to tell us more about the depression and anxiety you're experiencing? If you're comfortable doing so, you might want to write about why you're depressed, and if there's something specific that's causing anxiety right now. We don't want you to go through this tough time alone.
Jim
Hi, everyone. Fall has started, and that means less yard and garden work. That's a good thing in some ways. We're enjoying the peaches and pears from our small orchard. I'm still picking crookneck squash and tomatoes. All of those things are so much more tasty than store bought. Yesterday, I moved all of the tender patio plants to the cellar, under grow lights. We have flowers all winter from the geraniums.
The bad thing for me is that I don't get outside nearly as much during the winter, and that has an effect on guess what! Depression and anxiety is the right answer. For me, it's not so much the season as it is the drop in my activity level. Is any of that true for you?
I'm wondering how you're doing, @mckenzie, @kill9874 , @glenda1 , @anniegk and @magspierce . It's been a little while since we all connected.
Jim
Anxiety and depression are my constant companions-may as well embrace them as after all of these years they are not going a way.
@parus
I follow you. I rate my day on a scale of 1 - 10, 10 being the best day of my life. 4 is suicidal. I was down to 2 in '06, and it took more than five years to get up to 5, and I thought I'd never see 6, but I did in late '15. I saw it as my new 10, and enjoyed it for a year or so. After several months at a 4, I've made it back to 5, and I seem to be stuck there. I'd like to be up to 7, but I don't know if I'll ever get there. I'm adjusting to being between 5 and 6. I could probably survive at this level, and that wouldn't be a bad thing. Being married, I make an effort every day not to impose my depression on my wife. I know that it's been hard for her to live with a depressed husband since '04. She does acknowledge that I'm better than I was, but she thinks that I should have figured it out by now (her words). As you say, we might as well accept where we are, and not feel guilty. I'm not sure I can say I embrace it, though. I don't like the feeling of being depressed, and I'd be lying if I said it's ok. But, like it or not, it is what it is. We have to carry on as best we can. Having things like music, art, pets and other things really help us.
Jim
@jimhd I cannot say I enjoy depression. As you mentioned, "it is what it is". I live alone and can muster up a smile when around others, be funny, enjoy myself and forget the depression for a while. Keeping busy in the past kept me from noticing. Looking back (not for long) I was depressed from a young age and did not know thus. One of those kids that was passive and shy, made fun of as all kids are at some point in life. I see how children can be so cruel and I hurt for the ones being picked on by other kids or even adults that are verbally abusive. I grew up with a verbally abusive mother and when I became an adult I made the choice to not be one who yelled and screamed, denigrated others. I know many people like this who continue doing so because it works for them. It gets them what they want and the cycle continues. I see it working for children and I find it disturbing.
Well, this has nothing to do with depression. I don't want others knowing I struggle with depression as it is nothing to be pleased about and don't use the depression as a means of getting attention-I really do not like being the focus of attention. I know others with depression and they wear it outwardly wanting others to feel sorry for them. I see them use the depression as a tool [weapon] to get their way. They use depression to control others if this makes sense. The last thing I want is for others I know to see the depression. It is mine to carry and even in this world I do have happiness that is genuine. It takes little to give me happiness and having a lot of possessions does not work for me. I miss having a dog, but being able to walk it and care for it properly...not an excuse, reality and it is okay.
Interesting, I’ve been suffering severely with anxiety, depression and panic attacks for 3 months now, all related to coming off Lyrica, which I am down to only 50 mg per day now. I awake in the morning with shear terror, get up come downstairs and hang on to the kitchen sick with fry heaving and nausea. I take an 0.5 mg of Ativan and it usually kicks in with in a half hour. Ativan is only temporary. I’m exhausted, weak lod5 25 lbs in three months, food makes me nauseous I can’t even look at it. I have to force myself to even try to put something in my mouth. I have an appointment Jan 16 with a psychiatrist hoping she can help me be myself again. I’ve always been outgoing neve4 afraid of anything. I feel so bad for my family, I don’t want to cook or do anything. Ask my husband yesterday to go by me a gun bear cause now I know wh6 people commit Suicide!
Hi @cdcc, you are not alone. There are several people here on Connect who have had similar experiences. I'd like to bring @jimhd into this discussion. May I ask what you were taking Lyrica for and why you've decided to taper off of it? Is it possible that you are tapering too quickly? Have you talking to your doctor about your panic attacks and suicide thoughts?
This topic sums things up in 2 words that I prefer to not have in my life. If wishes were horses beggars would ride.
Hi Colleen
I was on Lyrica 300mg daily for trigeminal nerve shingles severe case that I had to use doctors at Johns Hopkins. They gave me Lyrica for the severe itch on the side of my nose right eye, forehead to the crown of my head which is still persistent. I decided to go off Lyrica because I began loosing my teeth which is one of the minimal side effects they found in their clinical studies. Being that it is minimal they do not put it in their contraindications. My tapering off of it was precise from Pfizer and potion control. But since taking it for four years the tapering schedule wasn’t long enough for me. I am still taking 50mg daily which I am to taper to half capsule daily, I have not tried this yet as I still feel so out of it. My doctor has me on 0.5 mg Ativan daily but only for short term use. When I awake in the morning I am so nauseated and dry heaving you would think I have morning sickness which I don’t . I usually try not to take the Ativan for awhile but it usually doesn’t work and I get really bad off. I’ve lost 23 lbs since Oct and I am tiny to begin with. All thecwuthdrawl symptoms I’m having are the same symptoms this friggin drug can cause when first taking it. I do have an appt with a psychiatrist Jan 16, I have no idea what else to do except get a lawyer and sue them for what this has done to me. Someone needs to pay. I feel like I’m never going to be myself again