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What has helped you feel less alone in your grief?
Loss & Grief | Last Active: 2 hours ago | Replies (10)Comment receiving replies
Hi Dawn,
My husband died two years ago from lung cancer. Even though I was prepared for this since he had lung cancer for 14 years I wasn't quite ready for the shock and loneliness that I found myself in at the instant of my husband's death. We were married for 30 years. What helped me the most was my faith. I prayed to God everyday many times and he got me through that terrible time. What also helped immensely was just very kind people who expressed their sadness for my situation. It didn't matter how they expressed their sincere concern for my sad situation but that they took the time to do so. It meant so much to me. Also the hugs were welcome. I've never been hugged by so many people! It didn't matter whether they agreed with my religious beliefs or my politics. They were literally concerned with helping me get through a really bad time and that meant a lot. Also what helped a lot was Mayo Clinic Connect! I received so many nice messages from perfect strangers! That made me feel so good and not so alone.
Another thing that helped me was routine. I made myself get up at a certain time every day, make the bed, eat breakfast, pay the bills on time, keep doctor appointments etc. Donating a lot of my husband's clothing, tools, etc. (What am I going to do with a chop saw?) helped to take away a lot of the visible memories that would make me sad.
I believe that my husband is up in Heaven. I miss him terribly. But we'll be reunited one day in God's time. However, at the moment this is my life and I have to make it the best that I can. I'm 80 and have few friends and no family but with God's help and a lot of very nice people, I've been able to do that quite well. I'm not nearly as sad as I was two years ago.
PML
Replies to "Hi Dawn, My husband died two years ago from lung cancer. Even though I was prepared..."
@pml your words are so helpful'
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@pml Thank you so much for sharing your journey with us. What you said about the shock and loneliness, even after 14 years of walking alongside your husband with cancer, is something I think many people can relate to. Grief has a way of surprising us, no matter how prepared we think we are.
I also smiled when you mentioned the kindness of strangers and how Mayo Clinic Connect helped you feel less alone. It reminds us that even small acts of compassion—a kind word, a hug, or simply taking the time to listen—can make a lasting difference.
Your words about creating a daily routine really resonated with me. Those simple, intentional steps—getting up, making the bed, keeping appointments—may seem small, but they can become anchors during grief. Thank you for reminding us that healing often comes one faithful step at a time. Looking back now, is there one daily habit that still brings you the most comfort or peace? I think your experience could encourage many others who are just beginning this journey. 💜
Wrapping you in prayers
Dawn 😊