@kjc48 Dear Karla, you have helped me and others so many times, might I say I’m glad you are coming to terms with the guilt you carried for so many years….when we are working and trying to do well and feel secure in our careers, whether they be outside or inside the home, - in those years, it can feel all-consuming. your mom knew how much you loved her and understood. I flew to help my sister in Arizona, not knowing how seriously ill she was (she was not a fan of going to the doctor) a few short weeks after my husband’s knee replacement. I was torn about where I should be…sadly, my sister was so ill that she died while I was there. I have those guilty tinges, but I also know she and I loved each other, and with my husband hobbling about, wel…I feel I did the best I could have, with the information I had at the time.
At any rate, you have plenty to think about…and as you said, now making all the important decisions “solo” is not easy. Give yourself a hug, and please always continue posting here. Best wishes-and take good care!