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@misssharon

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Teresa

Good evening, @parus. It is late, and I am sure that you are probably not up right now. I can identify with both what a couple of others have said on here, as well as the things you have mentioned. I was a licensed social worker for many years until a client made accusations against me and started stalking me.
I thought I had seen everything. Abuse, drug houses, neglect, con artists, incest, rapists, and all kinds of criminal behavior.
Gangs, death threats by gang members, psychiatrists who just sat there and didn't say a word. Being on the Autism Spectrum and not even knowing it, I was already anxious and depressed. So I never told any therapist about all the bad things that had happened to me. I had enough labels.

I had horrible, vivid nightmares. Still do, to this day. I had a head injury in the early 2000's, which is what reactivated my
Fibromyalgia, which had been gone for years.

Now I have flares that seem to last forever. They bring up depression, feelings of worthlessness, anxiety, and loneliness. But one good thing has come out of it all. I am learning to say "no."

I am learning to not be a people pleaser. And to stand up for what I believe in. I try to understand my feelings, and think things through. I do try to face my fears, but I am still protective of my family.

I want to thank you for sharing your story. You inspire me and help me to be honest with myself. I hope that I can "talk" with you again sometime. Have a lovely day tomorrow!
Mamacita

I have participated in several types of therapy for extremely severe PTSD. I participated in intensive trauma therapy which included EMDR, yoga for trauma, (all holistic) with several different doctors. One piece of advice, watch therapists and doctors that ‘think’ they can help. They may have studied it, but that doesn’t mean they GET IT. I’ve been to therapists that have actually made me feel worse because they thought there was some magical switch in my brain that could just turn it off. WRONG. While the EMDR seemed to help it was nearly impossible for me to get to discuss what actually happened as I became unable to sleep as well as pre-diabetic. It seemed the more I talked about it the more intense the flashbacks became. My therapist was wonderful and I certainly can’t say EMDR would not have worked, but I got to the point where it became too painful and difficult just going to the appointments. After going I felt great, but getting there was another story. The yoga for PTSD/trauma seemed to help tremendously in learning how to breathe, how to feel ‘grounded’ and getting rid of the constant looming feeling of fear.

I also did Nuerofeedback for my PTSD a couple years after the intensive trauma therapy. I chose to do this because I thought I wouldn’t have to talk about the trauma but also because someone I respected greatly had completed neurofeedback in Canada and said amazing things about it. While the Nuerofeedback did bring back the memories of the trauma (which I was not expecting) it helped TREMENDOUSLY. I went to the ADD clinic in Scottsdale, AZ for 2 weeks (they do several types of Nuerofeedback for different types of mental illnesses/disorders - it is also not impatient, I just knew I needed to be away from my family while I tried to deal with my PTSD and what might come by opening up the repressed part of my brain) to complete ‘intensive’ treatment. Nuerofeedback typically takes people several months to complete. I would not recommend trying to fit Nuerofeedback into an intensive 3 week schedule, as it was way too much for me to deal with in such a short amount of time with respect with getting through flashbacks and remembering more than what I was really ready/able to deal with in such a short amount of time. However, I would ABSOLUTELY recommend neurofeedback for anyone suffering from PTSD. It helps calm your brain waves so that you are not obsessing about the trauma. It is completely natural and is unfortunately not all that well known yet for treatment of PTSD as it is somewhat ‘new age.’ However, all the research behind it makes complete sense, so seriously check it out. You can find doctors who do it in major cities. Many people who complete Nuerofeedback actually get to a point where they can simply stop going to their appointments bc it changes our brain waves permanently and we loose the crippling feeling of fear that haunts us. For me it seemed to open up parts of my brain that my brain was not able to access (therefore bringing back flashbacks/repressed memories) but also gave me a TON of clarity as to why my behaviors became what they had and how the trauma affected who I ‘became.’ I learned what triggered me and made me feel certain ways as well as why my behaviors or feelings were what they were, even if I did not actually have a reason to feel afraid. A lot of what we feel comes from repressed memories and if we can’t identify them, we have no idea why we suddenly feel scared, anxious, freaking out, etc. Being able to identify what triggered me to feel such terrible ways was crucial in working through the PTSD. Most importantly, I lost the constant feeling of paralyzing and gripping fear. I certainly hope this is helpful, as PTSD is no joke and anyone suffering from it know this. They may just not be able to SPEAK IT. My heart goes out to all and again I hope this information was of some help!