@diverjer
Don’t worry about using lower weights. What you want to do is enough reps that you can’t do anymore, that’s the key to getting a buildup of muscle. Your doctor having you do the lighter weights just because you are recovering. Once you are fully recovered from the surgery, you can move back up in weight.

Hopefully the incontinence will get better over time. It usually does.

Though I will leak really Heavily if I’m moving around a lot, I don’t leak it all laying down unless I sneeze or cough.

Yours should get a lot better, He does for most surgery patients.