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Talked to the therapist today. Told her the depression is becoming overwhelming because of the pain becoming worse again and knowing there are no answers this time or treatment I can afford. We both know what antidepressants do to me. I need help with the physical pain which is interfering with my battle with depression. I see the pain specialist next Tuesday which is pointless. He likely will tell me to do my shoulder rolls and breathe. So dehumanizing. Maybe recent CT will make some kind of impression. Trudge, Trudge. Yes the self harming thoughts are present. At least the pain would be visible. The depression monster comes a lurk, lurking, lurking. We are stronger than the heavy tread. Can't go back to the old ways.
Replies to "Talked to the therapist today. Told her the depression is becoming overwhelming because of the pain..."
@parus Parus, I am extremely worried about you. Yet, I feel I don’t know enough about your situation. I know this sounds simplistic, but can you schedule more visits with your grandson? He brings you such joy! You need more of that joy! I care!
Karen
@parus- Oh boy, and here you were so happy. I'm not sure that your psychiatrist is helping you. Do you? I'm really worried about you too. IIf things aren't working for you, which some don't seem to be doing, you need to speak up- "Enough with the shoulder rolls!" "I need something else!" Are you able to do this?
@parus Hey Parus, I’m so glad to see your posts! I have been watching. I had to go to the dr yesterday. I’m unable to get out of bed, feed myself, do clothes, etc. I’m having terrible panic attacks (although what panic attack isn’t terrible). Life can be so hard. I’m grateful I have my brother to help me. Please let me know how you are today. For me, weekends are the hardest!..........Karen
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@parus What was the therapist able to offer to you? It seems she is sympathetic to your issues. Does she have any connections or colleagues to touch base with? Is there any medical school or teaching university within your locale that you can avail yourself of? Can you contact NAMI [Nat'l Alliance on Mental Illness] for local support groups or resources? I am worried for you.....
Ginger