You are not alone ❤️

Hi @cstone - when you talk about not having anyone to walk with, are you talking literally take a walk with, or figuratively, like walk with you through life or feeling down? Are you on medication right now?

@cstone so sorry you’re going through this! Have you looked into any support groups? I’m thinking of joining some focused on mental health and they have many online if it’s hard to get out. In person might be good to help you get out. Hang in there! ❤️

I don’t have anyone to walk with and have not gotten out of bed for almost a week. I am sinking.

Is anyone else living in Chicago alone and depressed? I am 67, living with chronic pain and have been passed from doctor to pt to spine surgeon and back to new doctors without answers. I have tried to find the way out of my bed day after day, but keep retreating. My therapist is there for me to talk to, but I have no one to come and get me out of my apartment for a walk.

@climbingmountains81
Where can I find support groups?

A full change in medication was the first step to a major recovery for me. That alone saved my life. The previous one was amplifying severe depression, something known to be possible for a quite small number of patients taking it, and that landed me in the hospital after a near miss. After years of passively taking what I was prescribed despite a steady worsening of my condition, I began advocating for myself because I knew things weren't working. I just marked two years since the switch and the difference has been indescribable.

A good counselor who I see weekly has been and continues to be a major factor. I look forward to that one.

Being open with friends about what I went through after hiding it for a long time and paying a very high price for doing so has proven to be a huge well of support. On those occasions when I need to talk about it, which aren't as frequent as even a year ago as my recovery has progressed, people are there to listen. I've also learned that some of those friends have dealt with their own struggles, which has deepened our connections. Now I'm also there to listen.

A weekly mountain bike ride with friends where the first rule is, the slowest rider sets the pace, gets me outdoors and active and offers some stupid good fun with a lot of laughs. In fact, one of our running jokes is what we call the Dumb Scale to determine how dumb, and therefore how fun, the ride was.

Keeping a pet in the house, in my case a dog who is a constant presence and who needs a daily walk, and therefore gets me outside and moving every day, has been key.

Limiting my news intake. I do write to my state and federal representatives and senators when I feel the need to offer my thoughts and also attend the occasional meeting on issues of concern, but I don't spend all day every day refreshing the pages of news sites to catch every detail, which can foster a sense of hopelessness. Balance is needed there.

Getting off social media was, apart from the medication switch, the single best mental health decision I've made in the past two years. There's too much fighting and too much negativity. Removing that from my daily life has lifted my daily mood. I communicate with friends through texts, emails, and especially face-to-face and don't get bogged down in the vortex of online anger and abuse.

As far as online support groups go, I stick to ones like this that are moderated and tied to professional organizations, while staying out of ones that are filled with people who freely post misinformation and rage. I know a lot of people in them are good people who have suffered severe problems, but I don't want to get caught into the anger and especially the attacks on providers, most of whom are doing their best. I don't find going down that road personally helpful.

Those are few of the things I've done, and apart from the mountain bike group, which I've been involved with for decades, all of them have become part of my life in the last two years. At present all of them are working for me.

@depressedbutnotdead so glad to hear all of those have been helpful for you! I’m glad the medication change made such a positive difference for you. What medication ended up working for you? Thanks so much for sharing your experience. I hope things continue to go well for you.❤️🙏🫂

@climbingmountains81 Thanks.

I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 at 59 after lifelong cyclic depression that dated back to childhood. My general physician put me on Effexor some years ago while I was dealing with a pretty rapid series of family deaths. All of them expected and so no time to process one before moving on to the next. A very small number of bipolar 2 patients will flip on antidepressants and sink deeper into depression, which is what occurred in the wake of the losses. For me it got suicidal before I was hospitalized and diagnosed.

My psychiatrist put me on Lamotrigine, and I just marked two years without a single bout of depression, down from three or four lengthy bouts a year since grade school. And not a single thought of suicide, down from what had become daily for the last three years that I was on the antidepressant. Other major issues also went away on their own. Sleep and eating disorders; substance abuse; uncontrolled rage that nearly ended my marriage; habitual dishonesty (when you're hiding severe mental health issues, lying becomes natural); violent fantasies...the list goes on.

I'm thankful above all else for three things. I'm still here, which I feel 100% sure I wouldn't be if the medication change hadn't happened when it did. I'm still married (just celebrated 30 years). And I didn't have to go into rehab. I was basically drunk every single night for three years and hiding it like an alcoholic. Once I switched meds, the compulsive drive to drink quickly vanished without me giving it much thought.

I feel pretty fortunate. I wish everyone could have such luck. Contrary to the screen name, created before I got out of the pit, I'm not depressed anymore. And definitely neither dead nor wanting to be.

@depressedbutnotdead wow! That’s fantastic. Thanks so much for sharing your journey! I’m so glad you’ve had such a positive experience switching to that med. I’ve wondered if there’s a possibility that I might have some bipolar in my system. How did you eventually get diagnosed? Like what led them to make that decision? Any mania or hypomania? I haven’t really experienced that much which is why I never considered Bipolar a possibility but I wonder now. Lexapro and Wellbutrin worked for me for many years but then I titrated off and have had terrible issues and side effects restarting that are way more pronounced than the first time around. Thanks for sharing your experience and so glad you’re doing so well! It’s very encouraging. ❤️

@climbingmountains81 The diagnosis came while I was in the hospital after very nearly taking my life. I feel it's accurate. It explains far too much about my personal history. Too many things line up. Additionally, the reaction I had to Effexor has been shown to be specific to bipolar patients. The studies I found were like reading my own experiences almost word for word. And since Lamotrigine has been shown to treat bipolar depression, and because it's working, I'm again finding support for the diagnosis. Additionally, while she was never diagnosed, I'm certain my sister was bipolar 1. And it's known to cluster in families. She would swing radically and suddenly. From the funnest person in the room to completely shut down. And without warning. My shifts were always more subtle. I slid in and out of it quietly, but not outwardly. She'd have full-bore manias. I mostly didn't. I like to joke that with bipolar 2 you don't much get the fun part (mania), just the bad part (depression). But really, you don't want either. I just have a dark sense of humor.

I'd suggest seeing a psychiatrist. Or even two or three for second and third opinions. And most importantly, advocate for yourself. Nothing changed for me until I took ownership of it. As I told my counselor, a few months after getting discharged, I went from being a passive recipient to being an active participant. I stumbled on the studies that described my life. I'm actually the one who figured out that the antidepressant had become the biggest driver of my depression. It's known thing, but uncommon enough that my psychiatrist had never seen it before. A while back she told me she's using my case moving forward as a reference so that if she sees similar symptoms, she'll consider the possibility of the same thing happening to another patient. So perhaps what happened to me will save someone else.