Losing hope - life is filled with anxiety and stress

@desi09858 it sounds like you are carrying a heavy burden and I think it is great you are seeking solutions.
1) you say you don’t “feel” like your parents would support you- that totally makes sense! Many of us do not have supportive parents which sucks. However - one thing I have learned from therapy is “feelings aren’t facts”. I would encourage you to bring this up with your parents if there is even a chance they would support you getting help.
2) if you are able to discuss treatment options with a professional, I would really encourage you to be open to what your doctor says in regards to medication management for your unique situation. I find it discouraging when people on social sites make broad statements like how you should never take meds. It’s very stigmatizing and you should feel no shame about using tools that help you get better. Medication is just one tool. It’s not one size fits all. And there are risks. However you and your doctor can discuss options that work for YOU.
3) if you are looking for a free resource to help you manage your thinking using cognitive behavioral therapy, I recommend the app Feeling Great. It’s developed by Dr. David Burns MD, a renowned psychiatrist. I’ve used it myself as a supplement to therapy and medication.
Good luck and we are all rooting for you!

I started experiencing depression and anxiety when I was about 14. Some of that was due to wonderful parents, that didn't address these issues with me. I just had to pretend I was OK. And my parents were really good people, but they didn't understand.
Another thing that looking back, I realize was very much a factor.
I was and am addicted to sugar. I realized that my diet (once I became honest with myself.) was high in refined carbohydrates and sugar.
That was only about three or four years ago and I am in my 60s. Once I got that under control for the most part, I lost about 40 pounds and I look like a completely different person.
Unfortunately, I had started taking a benzodiazepine over 20 years ago and I cold turkey last year and that has been awful. The one thing that has been helpful is my diet is pretty clean. I don't know that I would have survived it.
I digress.
Be really honest with yourself, and look at what you're eating, or not eating. What you'll find out is that you must be the one that looks after yourself.
And that's a hard thing to come to terms with when you're just a kid.
I believe I just have a real sensitivity to things like carbs, which includes refined foods like flour, and also sugar and alcohol. (and let's be real, alcohol is a toxin... it's not good for anyone in any form)
Exercise is also a good thing for people like us.
Be kind to yourself, and also understand you have a purpose. You really do.
Because of what you are experiencing, you will develop a deep empathy. And God knows this world needs that.

@ashleyharris728 thanks for the advice! I think I’m scared to bring it up because I don’t want people to just see me as a mental illness or something. I wanna feel better and seek help, but I feel embarrassed and I struggle with asking for help. I’ll work on it though and I’ll definitely check out the app you recommended!

@desi09858 don’t give up and don’t be afraid to ask for help. I’m 58 and I still struggle with anxiety. Doesn’t mean I don’t have good times. Don’t be embarrassed. There are more people than you know who struggle. Find a good support group with solid ideas and help. I use recovery international. Totally free. It’s takes time and effort? But you can live with this. Good luck.

@desi09858 that totally makes sense. I think a lot of us feel the same way, even though we are older. It’s a struggle for sure.
I would encourage you to look at it from another angle. If someone you really cared about approached you for help, would you judge them harshly? Or would you feel honored that this person turned to you because they thought you were a kind and open minded person? That is the way I feel when people need me. Now I do need to take my own advice because it’s much easier said than done. However, know that there are so many people in this world who would consider it their privilege to help you. And once you’re feeling better, I’m sure you’ll do the same for others. These experiences with mental health are so challenging, yet they do have the silver lining of building compassion and understanding for others.
I always have so much hope for young people who are figuring out what they need and what works for them early on in life. I know this is such a tough time for you and I don’t want to downplay that one bit. But I do hope that you treat yourself with the loving kindness that you deserve and seek support so you can make it to the other end of this struggle. Like everything, nothing in this life is forever. Sometimes we just need to make it through, but it can be a lot easier with support.
Wishing you all the best

When my twin daughters were about 15, they came to me with written letters about how they were feeling with severe depression, and that they needed help. I immediately got them in to see a psychiatrist. If you are more comfortable writing it, maybe that would help. Of course you need to be there too, not just give them the letter. Hopefully they will react better than you are thinking. I had no idea my daughters were feeling that way - maybe your parents have no idea as well. You have to try. If they really won't help, do you have a grandparent who could speak to them? If not, I'm sure someone will help you find an organization that can help. Don't give up - you are very young and have your whole life in front of you. You just need some help getting through this part.

@desi09858 When I was your age, I went through a very dark period, also. Although my father tried to understand what was going on, he couldn't, and my mother was not available emotionally for me. But there was a friend of my mother, a mother of a classmate, who had all the support for me in the world. This lady took me under her wing and supported me, offering a safe haven to talk when/if I needed to. She took great care of me emotionally, and promised to never repeat anything I told her. Perhaps you have someone like that around you? Or an aunt/uncle/older cousin?

And like @lylii mentioned, writing down what is bothering you can be a great place to start!
Ginger

@lylii writing it would definitely make me feel me comfortable so I think I’ll try it! Thank you for the advice

@gingerw I do have an older sister that cares a lot and would listen. I just need to get over the fear of actually telling someone how I feel

Don't lose hope. Talk to a teacher or the pastor of your church about how you feel. Call a hot line. There is help for you