How do I add aging issues to a life I have never been happy in?

Wow... really liked the above post from sisyphus!

But... also the ones following... from the "musicos" -- Ed & NYC... and NOT just cuz I'm one of them. ;>)

And I'm gonna propose we form a small combo here... maybe, we could be "The Mindful Mayo Medical Music Machine," or some cooler / hipper name.

Since I came up with the idea first, I'm choosing to be one of the lead singers and to play either bass or rhythm guitar. Ed and NYC -- are you dudes in? Pick your spots quickly before someone else grabs 'em.

Impatiently, waiting to hear how this flies with the everyone.

/LarryG

I sure know how you feel. I spent my whole life...my younger life, always thinking about how I look, or what I was wearing, or if there were men who be attracted to me. There weren't. The only men who were attracted to me were men who wanted something from me. It drove me crazy that there were very attractive women who knew how to talk to men and obtained their interest. I couldn't do that. Now I am 86. Very much alone and kicking myself for wasting all that time on things that I really brought me to a dead end...so to speak. When I look back, I think of the things I should have done instead. I should have learned things that would have made me feel good about myself. I wish I had learned to dance. It looks like it would be something that could make a person feel so free, and joyful. You don't even need a partner for that. I wish I had learned to play the piano much better than I was able to. That would feel very satisfying. I wish I could have learned to play the drums. I bet that could have gotten rid of a lot of frustration. I wish I could have gotten serious about a profession that I loved, and others would see me as knowledgeable and competent instead of just seeing what I looked like. Oh yes, and I wish I could have learned martial arts, to give me confidence, and give me the ability to defend myself. With that and dancing, I should have been in very good shape.

I can think of other things I wish I did that would give me self-confidence. To me, self-confidence is the most attractive thing about a man or woman. I think it would have given me the chance to find someone who is not so shallow as to just look for a woman who is "hot".

I don't know how old you are, but I think you would benefit by changing your focus from your looks and how beautiful other women are, to focusing on finding things that will make you feel good about yourself and give you self-confidence. Let whatever happens after that, happen naturally without trying to force it. You are responsible for your own happiness, don't think you have to have someone else to make you happy.

It's too late for me.

Grasping. I bet you have had and still do have very low vitamin D. And B12.
Get measured.

@edsutton
anger can also, be a habit.

good luck to us all!

Are you ok now? Are you happy with your crowns?

@margaretfriel why do you have to do your first face lift in your late 50’s or early 60’s? I’m 61 and thinking about it.

@bewildered
I am going by what my Plastic Surgeon advised:
a) He said after 'A Certain Age' the chances of surgery causing other problems could increase (due to the anesthesia/discomfort/pain relieving medications/etc. that follow the surgery).
b) As we Age it takes longer to recover from surgery (no matter what kind of surgery it is).
c) As well, as the face ages it may reach a point where the results won't be as effective/satisfactory as doing it when you're a little younger.
Remember, we're All like Snowflakes, no 2 are alike. Hope this helps.

@bewildered
My 2nd & Last plastic surgery was 12 years ago (when I was 76. ... & I Haven't regretted having facelifts for a Nano-Second. Occasionally people have commented: "I Can't Believe You're That old, you certainly don't Look Your Age!" (I smile) Thank Them & give myself a mental "Pat-on-the-back. Last Christmas my Grand-daughter (age 20) & I were together ... another woman inquired "You look so young, do you mind my asking how old you are?" When I answered "87" MY Granddaughter gave me a look of Astonishment, & said "No You Aren't!" I then told them "Born in 1938, To The Math". The Woman asked, "What's Your Secret?" ... (response) "I don't tell this to many people, but because my Granddaughter is with me so I'll share. I had facelifts when I was 62 & again when I was 74., keep my weigh at a healthy number, have streaks of color put in my hair & constantly correct my posture" (Stand up straight & walk like a younger person ... Works For Me! )
Excuse the cliche, but: "Works for Me!" (Oh, & P.S., my Gran-D gave me a Big Hug!)

Marianne -- Just about all the experts say it's NEVER TOO LATE for all of us... and that there's ALWAYS something we can try.

And with the strong spirit and extensive experience you've shared with us folks here, I'm CERTAIN the above applies to you.

All the best!

/LarryG

@lacy2

When you spoke of how we are judged by others, I am reminded of something I wished I'd learned earlier in life.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

Has given me a wonderful sense of freedom.