Thanks to all of you for sharing. I know Im not alone, but i feel many confusing things. Now I know im "normal". The horror of watching my husband of 48 years shrivel up and weaken in less than 6 months has been very taxing. He has stage 4 esophageal cancer. Fed by feeding tube every 2 hours by me. Cancer has taken control of our lives, plans, hopes and dreams. Lately looking for reasons to smile and laugh. Yall have consoled me. Thanks very much.