@johnjames I can sympathize totally. When I got bad with my cirrhosis, at the end, my husband was doing everything. I really hated that. He is not the type who does give much help generally so it was not something that came naturally to him but he certainly rose to the occasion and went above and beyond. I am so grateful to him.
JK

Thank you for sharing- yes I feel like I'm being lazy, and in my heart I know I'm not- I want to help her- she worked so hard, does seem fair does it. AGain thank you- that helps more than I can say. JJAMES

Thanks @contentandwell and @windwalker, your reply to JJames was right on. As you have shared this same experience you had an empathetic response. Teresa

Thank you both and Teresa I know your advice helps more than I can say. JJAMES

<br><br><br><br><br>John, have you expressed your feelings about this to your wife? I do. He <br>tells me not to worry and he understands and he doesn't mind all that he does. I <br>am pretty lucky in that dept. Our spouses are glad to help, but they also <br>deserve recognition and appreciation for what they do.<br> <br><br>

@johnjames I think when any of us are in that position if we express genuine appreciation it helps, and I commented to my son and daughter that Dad deserves a medal in front of him. Appreciation can go a long way.
I didn't know until after the transplant how frightened he was that he was going to lose me. My son was too although he and his father had not actually discussed that, they both had come to that feeling individually.
JK

<br><br><br><br><br>As a gift of appreciation; I am arranging for my hubby to get a <br>professional foot massage. He loves those.<br> <br><br>

@windwalker What a lovely gesture! Teresa

@contentandwell What a difficult time for you all. When I think of transplants I tend to only think of the patient, but the concern and worry of the family members is difficult as well. Thanks for that reminder. Teresa

@windwalker, what a great idea, a foot massage! I've never had one but I do have a regular massage once or two times a year. My husband goes monthly and loves them, I wish I had thought of gifting him with one.
JK