I see a lot of things going on..I have never been an alcoholic but I suffer from depression, anxiety and PTSD from brain injuries and am divorced so I understand the loneliness and that deficit..My twins are 14 and they feel that difference..I did not remarry my ex did..he is still not very nice but I am disabled and right now do not drive so that is the isolation..I have learned Psychiatrists only talk for a few minutes and regularly give meds..psychologists give 45 minutes of talking and cannot give meds..they work with the psychiatrist...Secondly we marry our family sometimes..that pain repeats...your kids have not resolved what they experienced and if by chance they did, you are not there yet...third..happiness starts with you so the first thing is finding you..who are you..what do you like..journal and you need to let go of the past and forgive yourself..how?.. GOD showed me..simply envision a movie theater with you and someone who makes you feel strong..now you do this when you feel you are ready to let go and I suggest first journaling out this negativity so you can see how your brain looks at life for a good few weeks just to meet you for the last time..then this exercise..but in this movie theater, one at a time, go through each negative, memory, thought, each one remember like a silent movie and let it play and then reach your hand up and like the old film strips pull it out of your head and look at your fist because it is there, out of your head..there will be a box by your foot..throw it down..each one watch and throw it down..you will feel lighter with each...then you pick up photo albums and give yourself good memories, listen to good music, change the colors in your home to bright happy colors, you can get a light box or open the shades and go outside and take a walk and breathe in the air and you know what , if you pray for your family..GOD is kind..you can write them..send pictures..tell your kids simply that you love them...And smile..I started changing every negative thought to a positive..took a solid year..but my body rejected my antidepressants..I do not produce Seratonin with a damaged Limbic system..but I am going strong..smiling...deep slow breaths and look in the mirror at you close your eyes and ask GOD to see yourself with HIS LOVE..and open them..start loving you...First step is seeing the problem then it is trying to find an answer, do not overwhelm yourself..one step at a time..You will get there..GOD BLESS