Bille, I still feel like that, too. It's been almost 3 years now. I may have to accept this is the new me. I can only describe it as a surreal world. Still experience joy, sadness, still have enthusiasm, but it all feels less intense, less real. Truly don't feel depressed in as far as a medical/psychological sense goes. Just feel oppressed, like there is a weighted veil between me and everyone else. Intellectually I know nothing has changed. My husband and children love me. The grandkids are still adorable, still make me laugh, still thrill me....but somehow it is all.....less. I am the only thing that has changed.

Do you feel this way? It's a bit disconcerting to me. I used to jump in with both feet. Now I dip a toe in and consider if I'm up to it....whatever it is. My brain wasn't damaged in a place that affects emotions, but my emotional make up is altered. I am very grateful to be here for my loved ones.My stroke was large, damage was great. My comeback was good. Deficits manageable, for the most part, but living with this surreal feeling is probably my greatest challenge and no amount of work on my part can correct this.

The headaches are impossible to control and hard to endure. They taint everything I do. Not exactly wreck all pleasure, but put a slight pall on everything. Hard to slog through. How do others handle these headaches?