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Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 1 day ago | Replies (616)Comment receiving replies
elm123 This sounds familiar. My husband was Dx a few years ago and he was also given an anti-anxiety/depression med. He has been mostly stable until the holidays.
The way MCI was explained to us by the psychiatrist was that it may not go farther but it could go as far as Alzheimer’s . He has been very stable but during the holidays he has started being paranoid and confused at times. I don’t know if it is the holidays or if he is progressing.
Initially he had started some fires, was scammed (I told him it was a scam but he would not listen) had me purchase all new coffee cups of a certain size…then started drinking only out of styrofoam cups. His personality changed. When he was originally tested (pen and paper type) I told them he would score off the charts and he did. It is exhausting at times. Is it for you? I am learning to smile and walk away.
Replies to "elm123 This sounds familiar. My husband was Dx a few years ago and he was also..."
@kmliste It is exhausting all of the time, and so very lonely. I don't think I can ever learn to smile and walk away. H is pretty stable, too. People outside of our family that know his diagnosis (whatever that is) say he doesn't seem like he's any different, boy do I wish that were true. He can be mean, he thinks he's always right and will look up things as soon as I say them to see if I'm right and delights if he has the slightest differentiation. When he gets confused in a conversation we're having or we're talking in circles (again), well you said, well you said, well I thought, blah blah blah, he will take a high and mighty stance and will say something like "ok, let's go back and go over this again!" and proceeds to explain what I said or did wrong and his version of how it played out, which is a confabulation. sometimes even telling me that I "need to learn". So very out of character for the man I married that was so understanding, kind, sweet, etc., etc.
Since he is still super independent, I find my self avoiding him and keeping very busy all day in every room except the one he's in, glued to the tv and his phone. I cry a lot because I hate this life and facing the future.
I'm sorry, I just realized I totally vented on you. I really wasn't replying to you to be all about me, but I'm leaving it so you know there are others grappling and so anyone else coming by will know they are not alone.
Bless you and keep on keeping on.
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@kmliste yes, it is exhausting and very stressful. Participating here and reading everyone’s comments helps me - I don’t feel so alone. My husband also gets confused and forgetful when his environment changes - so Christmas and New Year’s was hard for him. He couldn’t remember who was coming to visit or dinner or where we were going and kept asking me questions about it. A year or two ago it drove me crazy, but now I have learned to just answer him clearly each time. It keeps things much more relaxed that way. I don’t know what the future might bring, so I try to enjoy what we have now - but truly sometimes it’s very hard.