@anything4him
I never found an easy answer to your question. My husband had to retire early because he developed dementia. And he suffered and I suffered with him. Quite frankly the thing which worked the best for me was my job. At 66 I went back to work in a job which I could do at home while keeping an eye on my husband. The money paid for caregivers to sit with him while I went out or had an important in person meeting or crisis deadline. And the constant deadlines gave me something to think about in addition to his decline. I realize this solution is not possible or palatable for everyone but it worked for me. I worked until a year after he died. And then once the worst of the grief was over, I realized I didn’t need the job anymore and quit.