Reading the comments is such brutal truth. rwhite, you have been through a lot and it started at such a young age. I've been in an out of surgeries to fuse cervical issues as a result of my body mass producing bone spurs. I'm getting ready to go in on November 26 for a posterior laminectomy with fusion. I know I'm going to be in pain and I can deal with that because I've had it before. I just don't want to live the rest of my life with it. My doctor said that it will be a difficult recovery at times and I may be in for more surgery in the future. I am going to have to get it together mentally and physically. The days tic by .... am I doing the right thing? I'm losing the use of my left arm due to cervical myelopathy, weakness in my legs, very unstable etc. If I don't go through with the surgery, I'm looking at a continued slow process of losing the ability to walk. I have to give it a shot and pray to God that it at least stops the progression. Right now my spinal cord is flat because of osteoarthritis and bone spurs. Flat is not a word you want to read on a radiological report. We are some pretty tough people if you've gone through any bit of this in your life. You know what gets me is, you know your life is going to be different after surgery and you know that you have to put faith and trust in your surgeon. You know there's no going back after they wheel you into the surgical arena, the drugs are administered and you pray when you wake up that it was the right decision. I don't mean to be so dramatic but it's a tough situation.