@amberpep

I'm finally able to write a note. Thursday, I met with the orthopedist, who verified what I already knew. I have bursitis in my shoulder and arthritis in my thumb joint. I'm supposed to do pt for my shoulder. Oh joy! It's usually a waste of my time. Doing exercises just makes it hurt more. He could see that I have significant arthritis in my thumb, so he gave me a cortisone injection. It REALLY HURT!! I'm not sure I want to have that done to me again. The joint still hurts, but maybe it will improve. I've been having similar pain in my left hand, as well. I don't know what will come in the future. My hands are very important to me because I'm a pianist. The arthritis has been affecting my playing because it hurts to play a scale, every time my thumb moves under my fingers.

Friday I had an MRI. I didn't realize that the doctor had prescribed Ativan for claustrophobia. It's on my medication allergy list. Fortunately it didn't cause tachycardia the way it did a few years ago. But neither did it do anything for claustrophobia. I already take a similar medication every day, Clonazepam, so I had no response to the Ativan. I just closed my eyes and mentally thought about some songs, thinking about what chords I could play. As soon as my head entered the MRI I felt the beginning of a panic attack, but I managed to adjust my brain before it got too far.

Panic attacks are really unpleasant. I have them from time to time at night. I have to take off my Bipap mask, sit up, and ride it out. I've found that praying calms the attack most of the time but sometimes I have to go sit in my recliner for a while and focus on relaxing and breathing.

One of the services my service dog does is to sit in my lap and rest against my stomach and chest. It's a deep tissue stimulation therapy that calms a panic attack and also helps me when I'm more depressed than usual. I think she knows that what she's doing isn't just for her. Sometimes she comes to me on her own and puts her head on my lap, waiting for the signal from me.

We had a bumper crop of tomatoes on just two bushes. Before the first frost I pick the plants clean, even ones that are still quite green. My wife has pans set out all over the island, and the tomatoes finish ripening there. A bunch of them were ripe today, so she made a huge batch of spaghetti sauce. Most of it will go in the freezer to be enjoyed over the winter and spring. She makes a great sauce, and we had it for supper today.

Gotta turn off the lights and put on my Bipap mask and get some sleep. I hope you have a good Sunday.

Jim