This so sounds like me. I am 61 and have spiraled down in the last 3 years. I have a successful business, wrote and published a book and am a pillar in the community. That was me before 61. I wish I could get back there. I don't know what happened and have gone all different routes to find a solution. I think the best thing is to talk with people who are going through the same feelings and sometimes it is hard because I get my spells late at night. Medication can help but keep up the therapy and get involved in some support groups.